I don't understand my body

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Pandabunny
newbie
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Joined: Sun Feb 22, 2026 11:30 pm
Age: 17
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: straight
Location: New York City

I don't understand my body

Unread post by Pandabunny »

I've been trying to learn how to finger myself but I don't know how. I only really focus on the clit never anything else. When I do try to stick my finger in, it's hard to stay wet and when I'm relaxed enough to have a finger inside without it hurting as soon as I stick one in I feel this round kinda firm but kinda soft thing. It feels textured and i don't know what it is.

Is that my "prone bone" my cervix? Something else? It doesn't hurt but I have to go around it and it's a curve. I feel like it's blocking me or not giving me enough space and I worry it will become a problem in the future like it will block anything from going inside. How do I figure out what is it? Does it go away ? How can I know?
When I still tried to finger myself despite it I didn't feel anything really and it's not like it hurts, just feels weird :|
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
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Location: Chicago

Re: I don't understand my body

Unread post by Heather »

So, self-fingering is pretty difficult given the setup of your arms and fingers and how they are attached to the body and the way the vagina is angled. Generally, if someone wants to engage in the kind of masturbation alone where they have something inside the vagina, a toy is going to be what they need, because typically, a fingertip or maybe a little more is all a person can tend to manage. Too, typically a lubricant is needed for people to engage in sex that involves orifices, so it's not weird that all by yourself, you don't feel wet enough (and all the more so if you're not doing this in a headspace where you are already very turned on and feeling good from doing things that do feel good to you).

As well, it sounds like this is something you have been trying that is more about curiosity or feeling like you should do a thing than it is following what feels good. Things rarely feel good when we aren't leading with pleasure, but instead are doing things because we worry we have to for some reason. And if and when things hurt, we should just stop doing them, period: pain is your body's stop sign.

You don't have to worry about issues in the future if you want to do things like have manual sex (fingering) with a partner or intercourse of some kind because you're having struggles with this alone. A partner has much different leverage than you do, and far more ease when it comes to angles and such. And if those kinds of sex are things you really want to do with a partner and are feeling very turned on about, this is all going to feel very different.

In terms of your anatomy and where different things are, have you seem this guide to that anatomy yet? I'm happy to explain things in more depth here, too, or differently if something here isn't making sense, but if you haven't seen this, it's likely going to be easier to understand any more explanation if you start with some basics in your pocket: https://www.scarleteen.com/read/bodies/ ... terus-more
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
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