Traditional relationship

[SilverFalcon92]

To be honest with you, I’m not really a person who wants a traditional partner and myself isn’t traditional either. I want my partner and myself to be able to cook and clean for themselves and, for me, I feel like everybody should know how to cook and clean for myself. I want my girlfriend to pursue her career and her dreams. I don’t want my future girlfriend to be just cooking and cleaning all the time, and you don’t really need a traditional relationship to have a successful relationship either. I guess you can say I want someone who’s independent, but I want someone who’s I don't need you I want you kind of person. Am I crazy for saying this?

[mikky]

I don't think that is crazy at all! Lots of people want more from a relationship than to play out traditional roles. It sounds like some things you do want is to be able to see your partner flourish in life outside of your relationship and be a supportive person, and to feel like your relationship is driven by wanting to be with one another rather than needing one another. Are there other things you've identified wanting in a relationship? Do you feel like others around you feel differently than you do?

[SilverFalcon92]

Thank you for responding to my messages. It makes me feel heard and understood. For me. I want a partner who I can be comfortable having deep conversations with, and being able to be vulnerable with that person is very important for me to have, and I want sex to be a part of it as well. I do feel different than others and that’s because I don’t want to be one that’s paying for all the dates and paying the bills too. I don’t want a relationship to feel like a bill or me not dating because I don’t have the money for it. I also want someone who’s going to make me the best version out of myself to.

[char]

That sounds completely reasonable. If you haven't read them, I think these articles of ours about relationships are worth checking out, too. They discuss the very idea of makign sense of the relationship you want--platonic, romantic, sexual, what have you.
- Supermodel: Creating & Nurturing Your Own Best Relationship Models
- Potholes & Dead Ends: Relationship Roadblocks to Look Out For