Scarleteen

This is just a list of how I wish my childhood was different. There’s no specific theme beyond that, but the list is reflective of a significantly miserable and traumatic childhood. (I’m using childhood very loosely to mean 0 to my current age of 18, because I’m not sure a better way of saying it).

I wish I had parents that love each other, or a single mom the entire time.
I wish COVID hadn’t happened, or had been stopped faster (it’s not really stopped even now).
I wish I had friends I’ve known for my entire life.
I wish I lived in a home I like in a city I can walk in and take public transport in.
I wish my anxiety and depression was unfounded.
I wish I wasn’t chronically ill and in pain.
I wish I was a cis girl, or AFAB bi-gender (girl and agender).
I wish I knew ASL as well as I know English.
I wish I didn’t have so much trauma.
I wish I didn’t have years I can’t remember.
I wish I fully trusted my mom.
I wish she understood how think.
I want to stop wishing I’d had other people’s childhoods.

AQ

PS: I’m not suicidal or thinking of hurting myself.
PPS: I’m not sure what formatting of the list is best for accessibility—if a staff person wants to edit it for accessibility, please do so.

Morning, AQ.

Just sending you a ton of care and holding space for these feelings. If there's something more than that you're looking for from us with this, just let me know. I'll be here all day. <3