taking a risk and being someone or being safe and being no one

[PomPom]

so, i’m 18 years old and all my life i’ve been skinny, like a model-type of skinny. i love fashion world and i’ve even modeled a few times for my friends, but i’ve never imagined that i’d get a chance to build a real model career because i’m only 170cm (barely) and it’s not the best height for a career like this.

but recently a model agency reached out to me and offered me a contract! i’m not gonna get into the legal details and hesitation that i have about this, and just say that it looks real, and they answer all of my questions but there are some legal labels and things that makes me wonder why they choose this particular way of building this business. (i’m planning on reaching out to a lawyer dw) i also asked other models but they barely know anything about a contract they signed. like how can you sign something without getting into the smallest detail???

but this whole thing still looks safe and real. the real question i ask is - is this what i really want? because i’ve never particularly dreamed to be a MODEL. i want to travel, to be in a spotlight, i want a life that at least from the outside could look successful. a beautiful pictures to my inst, so for one, i wouldn’t be the one who’s jealous. i want to be SOMEONE, so i’m not just me - a not so very talented, smart or motivated college student. but i am A MODEL. i have something in me. even though usually when i was doing shoots for my friend i always thought “god i wanna be on their spot” and, while i’m trying to reach this, it’s a long road and my current ongoing education in another design field doesn’t help. (i study product design while i wanna study fashion design&tailoring. i choose this major because in my country you can’t study this in a college, only uni, so i’m stuck for another two years)

so i don’t know what to do. i still love to be a model, but i’m not sure if i won’t regret this decision (if i’ll sign the contract and would want to quit before the expiration date - this being a year. i would have to pay fee and pay for all the portfolio and stuff, so i can’t just try it and quit) or if i would regret not taking this chance. other agencies aren’t answering me so this may be the only chance i have. and i’m just so afraid to make a wrong move.

[Heather]

Hey, PomPom.

This is pretty far afield of what we do here at Scarleteen, a sex and relationships education service. Advice on careers outside of sex and relationships education just isn't something that's part of the services we offer.

I'd suggest you find a lawyer to review any contracts, and perhaps try and find some other people working as professional models right now -- ideally with the same agency -- to talk to about this. If you're already enrolled in school and have an advisor of any kind there, that also might be a good person to talk to about this choice.

I do want to add that I don't think this is about a choice of "being someone" and "not being someone." You're someone no matter what you do or don't choose to do, all of us are.