Scarleteen

When you're imagining the best-case scenario for how a relationship ( with romantic partners, friends, etc) will go, who do you look to as your model? Are they real people? Fictional characters? Something else? How has the way you imagined your ideal relationships changed as you've aged?

I'll go first. One of my first formative romantic relationship models was between Alannah and George in "The Song of the Lioness Quartet" book series. They care about and are attracted to each other, but they are also supportive of each others goals and independence. Plus, George is in favor of letting Alannah make her own reproductive choices, which I approve of

How about y'all?

I think one of the reasons that Harold and Maude was my favorite movie of ever from a pretty early age is because of the relationship that is at the core of it.

In a word, it's a non-model, something that acknowledges the incredible depth of connection that can happen even in a short-time interaction, that allows for freedom of everyone involved, and that also sees relationships less as permanent fixtures and more as spaces for people to grow, celebrate each other and themselves, find connection and springboard each other into their next steps.

I know that for me in high school and college, particularly, that seemed to sum up more of what my relationships were, and how I wanted them to be with the pretty-much-given that they were temporary and more about people learning and growing than settling in. Seeing that done in a way that wasn't sad or experienced as substandard, but beautiful and poignant, was great.