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I lost my orgasam!!!!

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ktcnc
newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2014 11:44 am
Age: 41
Primary language: english
Sexual identity: straight
Location: north carolina

I lost my orgasam!!!!

Unread post by ktcnc »

For a month now I cant orgasm like I use to...during sex and masturbation!!! Ok so I guess I should start from the beginning before my husband I would hardly ever orgasm during sex. The only time I would was during masturbation or what I liked to call "me time". Then I met my now husband...and it was amazing!!! Now I do understand that your O's do vary from time to time but this is wierd the intensity is hardly there or just not at all!!! Its even diffrent from before my husband.

The other thing that is wierd is my vagina feels bigger/wider to the point that even my husband has noticed! Me and my husband are very attracted to each other still...but I hardly get in the mood any more! Im 31 yrs old this is the start of my sexual prime time right? What is going on? Tips, advice, comments, stories, questions, are all welcome! I miss it and need it back! HELP!
Redskies
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1281
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 11:33 am
Primary language: English
Pronouns: they/them or she/her
Sexual identity: bisexual/queer/pansexual
Location: Europe

Re: I lost my orgasam!!!!

Unread post by Redskies »

Welcome to the boards.

Sexual desire and response do vary, change, and ebb and flow over time. Sometimes that's connected to things like physical and mental wellbeing, feeling comfortable in the place we're being sexual in, how excited and comfortable we feel with anyone we're being sexual with. Other times, it can happen for no identifiable reason.

You said you "hardly get in the mood any more". Not desiring sex, or not strongly desiring it, is usually a major dampener on sexual enjoyment and orgasm. Is there anything in particular that you think is connected to you not being in the mood? How are things going for you otherwise, in your own life, and in your relationship with your husband?

Vaginas don't have one static size. When someone is unaroused, the vagina's walls are closed in on themselves. With arousal, the vaginal canal becomes more relaxed and creates more space inside. The only thing that makes a significant, noticeable difference to vaginal size is vaginal childbirth, and even then, only from recent childbirth, and not permanent. So, unless that applies to you, it's unlikely that there's any physical difference in your actual vagina, but instead that something in your circumstances or mind feels different, and your body is responding differently.

Have you already seen these articles on our site? If not, you might find them helpful:
With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body
Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide
The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not.
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