Scarleteen

Hello! This is my first post, I just discovered this website and I love it already! So I'm just curious, I just started using birth control because I got pregnant a few months ago and had an abortion that I had to pay a lot of consequences for, physically and mentally. So I'm pretty terrified of getting pregnant again, to the point where I have dreams about it. I had to go in for a follow up appointment for a surgery I had to get and they put me on birth control. Now, should I continue using a condom when me and my boyfriend have sex? I don't really mind that much, although it's easier to not use one, and my boyfriend would definitely prefer we not use one, but I know that there is still a slight chance that I could still get pregnant. This worries me a bit, even though I know the chances are low, but I would also really like to not use a condom anymore. What should I do?

Hi Redheadcaligirl!

Welcome to Scarleteen! We're so happy to have you

First of all, have both you and your boyfriend been tested since your last partners (if there were)? If not, I would definitely suggest wearing a condom because BC does not protect against STIs, etc. With condoms, not only are you protected against STIs, but doubling up on methods is the most effective way to avoid pregnancy!
Also, check out this article: http://www.scarleteen.com/blog/heather_ ... _safer_sex
And! Check our condom shop out http://www.scarleteen.com/condom_shop Scarleteen users get 40% off these awesome safer sex helpers!

Regarding birth control on it's own, the pill--that is taken at the same time everyday, etc.--is very effective. Doubling up with a condom is still more effective, because you are more protected against human error in both taking the pill and using condoms that account for them being less than totally effective Have you seen these articles?
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/etc/h ... aith_in_bc
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... ebo_period

But what I would like to ask you, if it's okay, is if you have thought about stepping away and taking a break from having sex? It sounds like after your abortion experience, what is most important is self-care in healing the mental consequences. Would you like to talk more about how you can begin to heal and manage your anxiety?

Well I was tested when I had to go back to the hospital for a couple different STDs and I assume if they saw any other bacteria that would have caused suspicion of anything then they would have checked it out, so I believe I'm good. As for him, I'm not sure if he has been tested or not but we have had sex without a condom before so wouldn't I have already gotten whatever he had if he had something? If that makes sense.. If not, then I'll definitely be sure to use condoms until I know he doesn't have anything. (The article you linked me to scared me a bit haha.)

I'm actually going to go see a therapist very soon, already made the appointment, and I'll see what she has to say because I've had multiple people tell me the same thing about not having sex or being in a relationship right now, but personally I don't feel like having sex is interfering with my ability to heal from my experiences at all.

You never want to just opt out of any kind of preventative healthcare - and safer sex is preventative healthcare - because you didn't before and don't have infections (new ones) yet. Because you didn't get an infectious illness yet with exposure to it doesn't mean you won't. So, yeah, until he gets screened and comes back clear, at the very least, it's smartest to start using condoms.