The First Time

[ZannahGirl1]

Hi, Scarleteen,

In the past I have posted here about a couple of pregnancy scares, and you guys have been so helpful! I am not having a pregnancy scare right now but thought I would ask your advice on something that's been weighing on me.
I've been with my boyfriend for about two years now and we are definitely in love. We have done a lot of sexual things in the past year, but have not yet had sexual intercourse. This is something we are both extremely interested in doing this summer, now that we're in college. However, since I was so scared about being pregnant over something not even resembling intercourse, I'm not sure how I'm going to handle actual sex.
I am on the birth control pill and have taken it perfectly for months, never missing one and always taking it within four hours of the same time. He, too, will use a condom. I know that at the most our chances of conception would be like 1.2% at the most, and 0.01% at the least. My question is, how would a pregnancy theoretically be able to occur? Even if the condom breaks, isn't my pill enough?
I am very much bothered by my anxiety over this because I feel it's getting in the way of my pleasure, but by the same token, I don't want to give myself a heart attack. If we use both those methods, is there any reason to worry?
I so appreciate your help on this.

[Sam W]

Hi Zannahgirl,

So, with intercourse, it will never be 100% risk free. But, using two methods correctly (or even one like the pill) takes that risk down to an extremely small level. It's ultimately up to you to decide if you're comfortable with that very small risk, or if even that might set off your anxiety again. You can read about the buddy system here to see how effective it is:
The Buddy System: Effectiveness Rates for Backing Up Your Birth Control With a Second Method

I would also give these pieces a read and see how you feel:
Ready or Not? The Scarleteen Sex Readiness Checklist
Risky Business: Learning to Consider Risk and Make Sound Sexual Choices