Sex during periods

[Charlie57]

Hello all,
Since I've been sexually active (~4 years) I have never been bothered by having manual sex/ PIV intercourse while I'm menstruating (and neither have most of my partners). However, about a year ago I stopped taking the contraceptive pills I was on, and took a bit of a break from sex and dating. However, a few months ago when I was starting to think about becoming sexually active again, I decided to get a copper IUD, which I love and would totally recommend to anyone looking for an inexpensive, long lasting and low maintenance for of contraception. The downside of my IUD is that my periods are much heavier and longer than they've ever been, and I used to just take my cup out immediately before intercourse and use a condom and have very little mess, but that just isn't enough these days. I'm still within the first 6 months, so there's a chance that they'll lighten up again, but I'm interested in what any of you are doing about period 'management' during intercourse. I use a menstrual cup (which I would also totally recommend) the rest of the time, so I'd be totally open to trying Instead cups, or soft tampons or sponges or a cervical cap or anything else that works and I can get my hands on, but I'm curious what you guys have tried and what you thought of it!
Lauren

[Ashleah]

Disposable cups like you mentioned are a good option. You might just want to insert a new one before sex. Can also see if a female condom works better for you. If mess is a concern, another option is continuing to use the condom and having a towel handy to cover the surface or just there to wipe as you go along.

[Charlie57]

the towel idea is what I'd always done, until I got my IUD and the accompanying very heavy periods...now I don't think that's enough. The female condoms are a great idea, hadn't thought of those. Are the disposable cups high enough up that if I was having PIV intercourse my partner wouldn't feel it? I've never used one, just a diva cup and that sure wouldn't be

[Ashleah]

Most users (but not all) say that their partner doesn't feel it during sex if it is inserted correctly. So it's one of those things you won't know until you try.

[Esmerelda]

A cervical cap might be a good idea, and I know they are removable, so perhaps you could get one at your local clinic? Otherwise maybe try shower sex or some place where all the blood is not as obvious? In fact, even getting a dark coloured/black sheet might be good, especially if you have a mattress protector underneath. This might not help at other people's houses, but if it's in your room it will be ok. They might still have a bloody dick, but it won't look like there's blood everywhere. I hope that's helpful!
I'm glad that there's more people out there who are comfortable with period sex. I am sort of new to this, and have only slept with one partner while on my period, but in your experience, do many guys find it offputting? What about for giving head, if say, I've been using a tampon and keeping the area clean? (I'm planning on hooking up with someone in a couple days I know I'll be on... :p) If you wouldn't mind giving me some advice from your experience I'd love to hear it. Hope you find a good solution to your problem!

[Karyn]

You can always try a dental dam, which covers the vulva and prevents your partner coming in direct contact with your discharge or menstrual fluids. It really depends on what your partner is comfortable with, though, and that's something you can only find out by asking. Other people's preferences can only tell you so much.

[Heather]

Just FYI, cervical caps cannot be used during periods. Diaphragms can, but not caps.