Scarleteen

I recently read an article about a teenage boy who had looked up pornography on his computer just once and somehow, indecent pictures of underage girls wound up on the computer, and the police came to his house in the middle of the night with guns. I have a few porn sites on my computer history and I'm afraid to sleep at night. I can't talk to my parents about this. Is there anything I should be doing?

Hi Lucy. I'm so sorry you've been so freaked out about this. Unfortunately, to be honest, I'm not entirely sure what steps you can take. Maybe one of the other volunteers or staff members will have a better idea of what risk there is, if any, and what you could do about it, but I just wanted to let you know that your post had been seen. For what it's worth, I'd say the chances of something like that happening to you are pretty tiny, but I understand how the idea could be really stressful.

It's not a huge amount of help, but to help yourself relax a bit, have you seen this piece? Self-Care a La Carte

I want to make clear that, presuming what you read about wasn't urban legend, the issue with this story most likely hinged upon those images involving underage people: in other words, around child pornography.

It is a felony in the United States for someone of ANY age to access, create or distribute child pornography, and, as such, is treated as other felonies (major crimes) are. But that is something radically different than pornography that is lawful, with those OF legal age within it. No one is coming to the doors of the homes of people of any age who have pornography that is NOT a felony (and just having legally-produced pornography isn't unlawful for someone underage, but someone who is not a minor distributing it to a minor, or selling it to them is, but on their part, not the part of the minor. But since your age is listed here as 21, that's all a non-issue anyhow).

UPDATE: Hi,
I was looking for something in my computer history and I saw an old search page with a side link called "teen first time anal sex pics". I don't remember seeing that at all and did not intend to search for anything of the kind. I have not been very worried about what I wrote here a few weeks ago but now I'm a bit frightened that it's on my computer because that's exactly the thing I hear about the police going after. People who have images on their computer are questioned even if they claim not to have known about them. I don't usually worry about things like this, I just don't want to get arrested.

Hi Lucy4,

I would say that, as long as it was just a side link (so not a page you actually visited), there isn't cause for concern. Too, something to think about in the future may be using sites that are more focused on the type of images you are interested in, so that you can avoid running into content that you don't want.

I'd add that "teen" porn does not necessarily mean underage minors. In fact, it's much more likely to involve only people 18+ and therefore be perfectly legal. Again, as Heather said, the only things to be concerned about with child pornography are either pornography involving anyone under 18, or a legal adult distributing any kind of pornography to anyone under 18 (or, whatever the legal age is in the relevant country). Something that's simply called "teen porn" isn't illegal, and isn't in itself child pornography - only the actual, real ages of the people in it determines whether it's child pornography.

Hi,
I'm sorry I keep posting but I'm feeling a little shaky because a few minutes ago I saw what I think were two pornographic pictures of underage children. I closed the page right away because I was so scared. I was on a website I had no idea would have anything of the kind. I meant absolutely no harm and it was a complete accident. I think I know what to do to keep it from happening again, but I'm just worried about right now. I hear so much about people's whole lives being ruined because of this and how your computer is like your fingerprint. If I don't tell anyone about this, could the authorities find out anyway and come to my house?

I don't see any cause for concern, no. Just looking at a website, one not related to porn, is not going to cause any problems.

I am a bit concerned about the level of anxiety I'm hearing you express around this: is it something you experience with other things as well, or just this?

I don't usually get nervous about most things, it's just that I've found a lot of articles on the internet about how FBI can contact your ISP and see where you have been surfing if they have a reason to suspect that you might be up to something illegal, but I don't know if they keep an eye on people who aren't suspects. I do know that there are two child pornography images on my computer history. I don't know how they got there and it really was an accident. The message from the internet is basically "if you have child pornography images on your computer, even if you didn't do it on purpose, you will be found."

Just to be clear, finding that kind of content is NOT something that will happen on accident unless you are in really, really shady online places AND looking quite hard for it. From a legal standpoint we know that this is what makes catching people producing it so hard, because finding it is not at all easy.

I say this because I truly question the reality of you finding anything that is truly child pornography, and suspect you've got some anxiety brewing that's got you not thinking or evaluating these things rationally. Even just looking up the kinds of articles you have been doesn't make much sense and is probably you stirring up more anxiety on purpose without realizing that's what you're doing.

My best advice would be to check in with a general or mental healthcare provider for an evaluation. Anxiety disorders very commonly result in paranoia, in people having "bad thought," or attributing "bad" actions to themselves they haven't actually been any part of in reality. Same goes with purposefully seeking out things that create anxiety, and being unable to recognize that's hurting your mental health, but feeling compelled to keep doing it. In a word, this whole thread and your continued concerns here very much sound like something where what's really going on is a mental health issue, so I'd encourage you to seek out mental healthcare.