Scarleteen

About a month ago, I had oral sex with a guy I didn't know much about. He didn't ejaculate in my mouth (but wore no condom), he didn't have any outside signs of any STDs or STIs, and his penis was in my mouth less than a minute in total. I want to go to a doctor and get checked, but I'm afraid to because of my parents. They think of my as their pure and innocent little girl (don't worry, I'm just little and young in their eyes) and going to get checked for anything that has to do with sex will destroy my parents. I just want to be safe and get treated. I want to go to something like a free clinic or planned parenthood (or something that won't contact my parents), but there's nothing like that around where I live. Everything I've learned from sex in school and at home says I should get checked, but society and my parents tell me I should maintain my image. What should I do??

Welcome to the boards, sj.

You have a few options for getting care. First, you should know that when you see any healthcare provider, you and the healthcare provider do not have to tell your parents what was said or done in the appointment. So, you could ask to go to see a doctor just for a reproductive check-up and information session, and then ask the doctor for what you need. Have you already seen any healthcare provider about your sexual health (and that doesn't just mean STI testing, it covers everything to do with your reproductive system)?

It's important to get that care, because your health is important - and on that note, I'd put in a big vote for health being more important than image. Too, healthcare is a part of our own personal lives; when you're a teen and live at home, then yes, sometimes parents have things to say about our personal lives, but apart from that, our personal lives have nothing to do with the rest of the world, so really, what anyone else or society in general would think about it means absolutely zip.

If there isn't anything suitable near you, then you might need to travel a little to get care. If you'd like any help finding a place to go, you're welcome to give us your zip code.

Thanks for the options. My family is currently searching for a new family physician, so when we one, I'll make an appointment right away and ask the doctor to keep everything confidential. Thanks again for the support!