Does he want me? What do I do?!
-
- newbie
- Posts: 1
- Joined: Tue Nov 03, 2015 3:16 pm
- Age: 35
- Awesomeness Quotient: I genuinely care for others
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: she
- Sexual identity: straight
Does he want me? What do I do?!
In the beginning of June I started talking to this guy through one of those silly dating apps. We actually had a decent conversation and he asked if I wanted to go out bowling which I accepted. I wasn't expecting anything but we had a blast! Over the past several months we have continued to talk almost everyday, see each other often and build a friendship. I'm really into him. I love being around him and I want to be with him but I am not sure if he wants a relationship with me. In July...I kissed him. It was a little awkward as most first kisses are but he kissed me back - and we haven't since. I haven't tried since because I'm pretty insecure and nervous when it comes to making the first move and I am surprised I did in the first place. He does get affectionate sometimes, but very briefly. I can tell he is nervous too - but why are we nervous after 6 months?! He opens up to me about things, but has never told me how he feels. He makes plans with me, talks about future outings a lot, but still seems guarded in other areas. In my experience, if a guy wants to be with a girl, he will make it happen but I know he is also kind of different. He once told me he thinks friendship is the most important part of a relationship. But how do I decipher if I am just a friend or if he wants more? I know I should just ask him but because he is so shy I don't want to push him away and risk losing our friendship. I'm very confused and am not sure what to do. If anyone has any clarity or advice on the situation - that would be great, thanks.
-
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 2287
- Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:57 pm
- Awesomeness Quotient: I'm always wearing seriously fancy nail polish.
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: he/him, they/them
- Sexual identity: queer/bisexual
Re: Does he want me? What do I do?!
In all honesty, the only way to know what he's feeling and what he wants from this relationship is to ask him, as scary as that might be. I think if someone's genuinely interested in being friends, it's usually not too hard to move past any awkwardness that might arise from discussing the possibility of a relationship. Plenty of guys are confident in initiating a relationship, but that's not a rule; it sounds like waiting for him to bring it up is starting to be stressful, so it may be best for you to take the initiative here.