Thought I've been having for a birthday "present"?

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Nervousone
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Age: 27
Primary language: English
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Thought I've been having for a birthday "present"?

Unread post by Nervousone »

I'm not so sure if this is the right forum for this question (if it should be moved and can be, let me know). My boyfriend is turning 21 tomorrow, and well, I'm broke. I asked him if there's anything he really wants for his birthday and he said he's got me, and that he doesn't need anything else. I just want to give him something. He's really well off in terms of money, and I'm not. For my last birthday, he bought me a necklace I saw at the mall one day and said I'd love to get some day when I could actually afford it. Anyway, since I can't actually afford anything, I kinda figured birthday sex would be an idea that he'd like. I just don't really know how to go about it. Should I just lead into it like any other time, or do something extra special beforehand and use that to lead into it? What can/should I do?

(FYI, he and his friends are going out for a drink to celebrate. I'm 19, so obviously I can't go, so I'll have plenty of time to prepare something while he's gone. Also, he said he'll only be getting one drink since he's never seemed interested in drinking anyway. He just wants to get one so he can say he got a drink on his 21st. So it's not like it'll be drunk sex). I'm not going to force anything if he doesn't want to have sex. But he's never turned me down before, so I'm honestly not anticipating him saying no this time either. If anyone can help me out with this, I'd really appreciate it :) Thank you :)
Eddie C
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Location: Seattle, WA

Re: Thought I've been having for a birthday "present"?

Unread post by Eddie C »

I am personally someone who thinks that gift should be more personal than something that comes in a box, so I hear you.

Maybe you can do some kind of "coupons book." Things you can include can be: a massage, one home made dinner, movie night or even some sexual activities that both of you enjoy. :)
Nervousone
not a newbie
Posts: 22
Joined: Sun Oct 18, 2015 11:04 am
Age: 27
Primary language: English
Pronouns: Anything really. I'm not picky!
Sexual identity: Straight

Re: Thought I've been having for a birthday "present"?

Unread post by Nervousone »

Thanks! I like the coupon idea :) I'm making it now :)

I just have trouble when birthdays come around. He's able to afford the things I say I'd love to have. And I can't afford anything for him this year, and it's a big birthday. I am basically all I can give him, and I want the night to be as meaningful as possible. I don't want it to be just birthday sex. I want the whole night to be really meaningful. Before, during, and after sex. How could I go about the before and after parts of it?
Eddie C
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 747
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 4:48 pm
Age: 43
Awesomeness Quotient: I create. :)
Primary language: Spanish and English
Pronouns: She, her, they, hey you!
Sexual identity: Happy :)
Location: Seattle, WA

Re: Thought I've been having for a birthday "present"?

Unread post by Eddie C »

I like the idea of ANY birthday being a big birthday, you know? People use to say thing like: "You won't turn 21 again", but seriously who in the world turns 53 twice, right?

Maybe I am not the right person to talk about this because I actually do NOT like buying gifts. I honestly think that the things with more value are those that you cannot find in a store, or anywhere. I think that YOU being the only thing you can afford is actually awesome. :)

How can you make it more special? Try to think about what he likes and enjoys instead of what you want to give or what you wished you could give. If you can frame it this way, you'll see that maybe just popcorn and a movie while you cuddle (or after sex even), is actually an amazing way to spend a birthday together. :)
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