Scarleteen

Hi! I'm a sixteen-year-old girl who's just started discovering herself sexually. After a few awkward tries with a vibrator, I've gotten the hang of masturbation and I find I can orgasm pretty easily now. Since then ("then" being about a week ago), I've masturbated almost every night and kept going, even after I was sore down "there." Should the frequency and intensity of these, um, sessions be cause for concern, or is this a healthy level of excitement to have for this new part of me?

I was also wondering if it's unusual to feel guilty after masturbation? For as long as I can remember, I've associated my sexuality with shame (a lot of that is due to being sexually abused as a child) and often after I masturbate or become aroused, I feel a heavy sense of shame and self-consciousness. Am I alone in this?

P.S. I want to give a virtual high-five to all the Scarleteen staff for their awesome work I have so much respect for what you're doing and am very, very grateful that a resource like Scarleteen exists.

Hi Yossarianlives,

Thank you for the high-five!

With masturbation, frequency is generally not a problem (the exception being if it turns into a compulsion or it's seriously interrupting the rest of your life). However, if it's feeling sore, it might be sound to stop for the night, or to give it a day or so to recover. Soreness or pain can often be your body signalling that it's time to take a break and give it a chance to reset.

You're definitely not alone in feeling shame or guilt after masturbating. That's something plenty of people experience, especially if they've viewed being sexual as shameful in the past. Those feelings of guilt can be hard to shake off. We have a few resources on how to manage, or maybe even get rid of some of those feelings. Would you be interested in those at all? Too, if these feelings are connected to past abuse, working through them with a counselor who knows how to work with survivors is also a possible option for dealing with them.

Thanks for the help; I'm currently seeing a counselor, so that's not a problem. I would love to see some resources.

You're welcome! These two articles should be good places to start:
Is Masturbation Okay? (Yep.)
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... xual_shame

Thanks!