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How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 1:30 pm
by PaulDeCosta123
Had sex earlier with my girlfriend, we used a condom and checked it during sex and it wasn't broke so i kept going for a little while longer, not long, when i took it out i did not finish in her my girlfriend was giving me a handjob when i realized the condom was broke at the top, i do not think it broke during sex but if it did and i did not finish in her how serious are the risks, should i be worried or should it be okay? Would i have felt it break inside her if it did, and could the handjob have pulled it too far and broke it, it was only a durex thin feel condom..

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 1:47 pm
by Heather
If and when a condom breaks, it's considered a condom failure: where you simply may not have had the protection condoms offer.

So, to play it safest, given you're not sure when it broke, if your girlfriend wants to reduce her pregnancy risks, she'll want to use a form of emergency contraception.

Per safe sex with both of you, if you're already each getting tested around once a year or more, you just keep that up, and if not, it would be good in a couple months to get current with that, or start doing that.

Condoms rarely break, and when they do, it's usually due to user error, so if you'd like to troubleshoot your condom use with us to help you to prevent breaks better in the future, we're always glad to do that. :)

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 1:59 pm
by PaulDeCosta123
The condom was applied how it should be and i did check, the only thing i can think of that could have caused the breaking is from my girlfriend pulling the condom down while it was on the penis and since it was a thin feel condom it would break easier so the tension from pulling down during the handjob could have caused it to break maybe? She thinks it didn't break in her and im nearly positive it didn't im just not sure what to do.. Were in no position over the next few days to go get emergency contraception so i guess ill have to wait it out..

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 2:15 pm
by Heather
If she wants to use it, I would be happy to see if we can't find somewhere she can get it for no or low cost in your area, just let me know.

With condoms breaks, specifically, the biggest offenders are:
• Not using additional lubricant or enough of it
• Reuising condoms, or using one condom for a long time or for a range of activities without changing condoms
• Storing condoms improperly (like in pockets, or the bottom of a backpack or purse), or getting them from places where they were stored improperly
• Using condoms past their expiration date
• Not leaving room in the top of the condom when putting it on (for ejaculate to go into)

Any of that sound like your issue?

Just FYI, thinner condoms are actually MORE durable than thicker ones, so no need to feel nervous moving forward about using the thin styles!

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 2:22 pm
by PaulDeCosta123
I think she feels everythings fine she seems to believe it didnt break inside and i hope so, we didnt re use, they were only taken out of a new packet today, they were in date, and i pinched the top to make sure there was room.. no idea how it broke if im honest.. very worried though.. only 17 and cant have my girlfriend being pregnant now..

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 2:35 pm
by Heather
I completely understand, which is why I offered the help with plan B. So, maybe check in with her about that to see if she wants that help?

Of course, if she's told you she knows or is mighty sure it broke while your penis was in her hands, then we can all off the calvary with this period, as it would then be clear that you don't have to worry about a failure with condom during the intercourse. :)

Per condom troubleshooting, I didn't see you mention using a lubricant with the condom for either the intercourse or manual sex. So, if you didn't, that could be the culprit, and something you can correct with condom use moving forward.

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 2:47 pm
by PaulDeCosta123
thanks alot for the help, we can find somewhere its just family stuff has both of us jammed up with no time for the next few days so i think we're just going t have to wait and see which i dont want to but its the only option at the minute.. yeah we were just using the lubricant on the condom no extra, in future we will use extra lubricant . She seems to be not worried and fairly sure it didnt break in her, it broke in her hands which is a good thing if she was worried then the situation would be a lot worse!

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 3:37 pm
by Heather
You're welcome.

But for sure, if she knows it broke in her hand, you really are good here. Just sounds like lube is your likely missing piece for the future!

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 3:48 pm
by Heather
Btw, noticed your other thread here too, and sounds like in general you just may not feel very comfortable only using condoms.

If you want some options with that -- or she does -- happy to talk about those, too, which would basically be a) don't have that kind of sex for now until it feels less scary and even a very small possibility of pregnancy doesn't feel terrifying or unmanageable, or b) add a second method (which if this is just about you, means withdrawal, but if she also would like another method, that opens up a range of options).

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 4:04 pm
by PaulDeCosta123
that was a great help, i think she will be going on the pill soon anyway so that should ease both our minds about risks, thanks again.

Re: How serious is the pregnancy risk?

Posted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 4:10 pm
by Heather
You got it. And if she wants someone extra to talk about those options with, feel free to pass us her way! :)