Scarleteen

Hi,

I have recently become sexually active and have some specific questions.
I understand that the activities I am engaging in pose no risks of pregnancy, but may pose a low risk of STI's.

Recently, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were making out, when he started to rub my vulva (vaginal area and clitoris) with his hand, but over my panties, since I didn't want to take them off. Should he have been wearing a glove here, knowing that he was rubbing over my panties?

We also later had dry sex (he was wearing underwear and jeans, I only had cotton panties on). I had felt a spot of pre-cum (possibly, it could have been semen, but it felt more on the water-y side) on his jeans, but we continued anyway. I was a bit freaked out here, and I thought "how can pre-cum actually soak through underwear and make a wet spot on jeans?!) My panties were wet with my own fluids, but I think some of his pre-cum may have gotten rubbed on my panties as well. We didn't use any sort of barriers here (no condom or anything, besides the clothes we were wearing). I showered almost 2-3 hours after this, and my panties had been feeling annoyingly wet before I showered. Now, I am feeling a sort of itch/irritation down there, and I am not sure if this is a psychological reaction to not feeling comfortable earlier or whether I might have contracted an STI. Should he have been wearing a condom in this case, even though he had on underwear and jeans?

Do you see any possibility of getting/passing on an STI in any of the above scenarios?

Thanks for all your help.

Hi girl123,

So, a great place to start answering these questions is this article: Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?

As for the irritation you're feeling, that could be from a number of things. If it continues or gets worse, it might be time to check in with a health care provider to see if something is up (like a yeast infection, for instance).

I'm pretty sure that the first scenario doesn't pose any risks of STI's, since I was wearing underwear and he used his hand to rub over my underwear, so no possible fluid sharing.

As for the second scenario, the risk level for dry sex says "low risk" with possible infections being public lice and trichomoniasis. It would seem unlikely since we had 3 layers of clothing between our genitals, however maybe the wetness I felt had something to do with it (precum transfer onto my panties and possibly seeping through to my vulva/vagina as well)?

Also, would you suggest using some form of barrier (condoms for instance) or me being on the BC pill, even if we are only engaging in activities where we are both in our underwear?(occasionally only I have underwear on).

You got it It's also possible that the irritation is from the friction of your underwear rubbing against your skin. Too, if you're concerned about STIs, you and your partner can get tested just so that you both know your status. That takes some of the guesswork out of the equation.

With clothing on, a condom would not be necessary, since the cloths act as a barrier. As for the pill, that's really up to you and what would make you feel the most comfortable (some people like starting the pill before they are doing sexual activities that pose a pregnancy risk, because then they are used to taking it by the time they start having that kind of sex.

Thanks so much for your help, Sam! I really appreciate the work you guys do here at Scarleteen; it's helped me deal with many personal crises.