Scarleteen

I think im bi and ive worked hard trying to be sure of that but when i told my sister she kept telling me that its normal and just a phase and i wont know untill i date a girl. Is that even true. I thinj i like girls and boys. Im even more attracted to girls then i am to boys but i dont how can you be sure.

Hi Born_from_Books,

Your sister's reaction is, sadly, a common one to people coming out. But it contains some misconceptions about how sexuality works. With something like sexuality, you don't have to have had direct sexual or romantic experience to be sure of it. Think of it this way: plenty of people know they're straight long before they start dating. By that same logic, people can be gay or bi without having dated someone who is the same gender as them.

As for the idea of "phases," it's true that some people will experience shifts in their sexuality over time. But that doesn't mean that any given "phase" of their sexuality was incorrect or fake. They were just operating with the best information they had at the time. Does that make sense?

I think you might also find these articles helpful right now, and they may give you some ideas going forward about how to respond to people who have misconceptions about bisexuality:
Bi the Dozen: A Bisexuality Quiz
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... _and_women

Thank you so much

You're welcome