Masturbation

[firedude06]

I tried masturbation for the first time today. I was excited, but when I started nothing felt good. I tried multiple ways, but nothing worked. Am I doing something wrong? What can I do to provide pleasure?

[Heather]

Learning to touch yourself in ways that feel exciting and good is a learning process, just like learning to prepare meals you enjoy is. It's rarely instant: it takes time.

So, what people usually do (most often starting in early childhood: this probably isn't your first time touching your body or even your genitals) is just explore touching their own bodies and body parts over time, and ditch things that don't feel good -- or don't feel bad, but just aren't very stimulating for them -- and keep and then explore further things that do feel good.

No one else is going to be able to tell you what will and won't please YOU sexually, alone or with partners. That's something everyone can only really find out for themselves over time. And often, that process is pleasurable in plenty of ways (even just in the simple pleasure of taking time out for yourself), so it's not something that should feel like a drag. If even exploring your own body feels like a chore or not worth it, then that's a good tip that maybe it's just not for you at the time, be that this afternoon, or at this juncture of your life.