Scarleteen

Hi there,

I had the implant (nexplanon) fitted nearly 3 weeks ago, and I just finished my period for this month, my boyfriend and I want to stop using condoms and use just the implant on its own combined with the withdrawal method.
However, I'm a little apprehensive about this, I used to be on the pill before the implant and we used those along with the withdrawal method only 3/4 times during the 4 months I was taking them and i didn't have too many issues, but majority of the time we always used condoms 'just incase' but now with the implant, i feel like my protection is much much more secure yet I'm still struggling to learn how to trust it on its own since it's a new method of birth control for me, my boyfriend offered to continue to wear a condom to make things easier and if it's what I preferred which I really do appreciate of him, it's not that i don't like using condoms, I actually love using them because of their many benefits, but I would love to feel more intimate with my boyfriend and I feel like condoms interrupts that sometimes, so is 3 weeks long enough for the implant to be at it's full effectiveness? Am I safe to go without condoms and use the withdrawal method instead? Or should I just continue to use condoms for convenience? My mind is all over the place about this
My boyfriend and I were both virgins in any sexual activity before we met and have been only with each other since so if we decide to stop using condoms then I'm not worried about stds or anything (Please do not pressure me into getting tested or anything).

So really, my question is, how can I trust the implant is working for me and convince myself I'm well protected? What can I do to relax and enjoy sex without worrying about contraception so much?

Hi Angel Delight!

The implant is really effective at preventing pregnancy... but as you say continuing to use condoms is an option too, so you'd just be very protected indeed, which we recommend. Condoms also help prevent transmitting infections and keeping healthy... I'm really glad your boyfriend proposed continuing to use them.

For your comfort levels, all I can say is to try things out for what feels good to you. If using condoms helps you feel more relaxed then that's great... you could investigate ways of using them which suit you better, perhaps by having them closer to hand, so nobody has to go take them out of the packaging when you're already doing stuff, finding condoms that fit better etc.

Aside from the facts (that it's very difficult to find any cases where the implant fails) feeling comfort and confidence in a method this effective is going to be much more about trusting yourself than trusting the method. So if you think that could be an issue, there could be work to do there.

If it helps: you are so entitled to being able to make this choice for yourself, to look after your body and your wellbeing, and to seek out what feels best for you! Nurturing the idea that you have that right could definitely help you feel more confident and relaxed. You can do that through writing, meditating, or whatever works for you. If you really do continue to struggle with it and it feels like there are underlying issues, seeking out counselling can help too

Thank you so much for replying Jacob!! You've given me really great advice and what I was looking for, thank you

That's great to hear! No worries.

I also want to add for you that intimacy is emotional. A condom doesn't create any barriers to emotional closeness unless people have the idea they do, ultimately.

Personally, when I go through my sexual history, which includes decades of a lot of condom use, but also times without (including sex with people without penises to wear them in the first place), I can't find anything in there to suggest not using condoms somehow added any intimacy that wasn't there already.

I can, however, think of loads of times that using them opened doors to intimacy that otherwise would have been more closed because decreasing risks with them made me feel more safe TO be intimate.

You have said you feel much safer with them, which suggests that without them, you'd probably be having a pretty similar experience. When people feel safer is when we tend to be more emotionally open, not less.

Thank you for replying Heather!
If we did decide to not use a condom one time, how can I rely on my implant to be protect me? How long should I wait before going without a condom and use withdrawal instead?

Hi again Angel,

The implant is effective after around a week, so you are past that.

Your question of how you can rely on it isn't really something we can answer. You said you feel more comfortable with condoms, so you are in a way asking us how you can feel a way that you don't feel...

In my experience it is much better to make decisions which respect our own feelings, than to seek to change our feelings to accommodate a decision.

I don't like eating olives... I wish I did. I try them occasionally to see if that has changed but mostly I am going to stick with what feels better and respect my tastes, rather than chomp my way through bowls of olives doing a very sad looking screwface.

Thank you for the fast replies again!

Just one more question, how long does a pregnancy test take to become accurate? As I did have sex without a condom using withdrawal 31 days ago like described in the previous posts! On Saturday of this week it will be 5 weeks since the intercourse (tomorrow it will be exactly a month, it happened on the Saturday the 20th of August), BUT I was properly taking the pill during that time it happened (no missed pills etc etc) , but I'm still a little nervous about that one time, so would a pregnancy test show up an accurate result by now? Should I wait till the weekend?

Pregnancy tests make clear in their instructions when they can be used for accurate results. So, you just need to read the directions for what test you are using.

And just so you're aware, pregnancy scares are outside what we will (or usually even can) help with as a service.