Embarassed to buy condoms

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Jellowl
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Embarassed to buy condoms

Unread post by Jellowl »

Hello!

I have been thinking about buying condoms and lube for the sake of being prepared if I ever wished to have intercourse in the near future. I thought I should buy some in case my boyfriend either forgets them when it's time or doesn't have any. The only problem is that I'm super shy and embarassed to buy them. I've never done it before and I'm nervous that people will stare when they see a 17yr old girl buying those type of things. Is there a way to get over my nervousness and be more confident?

Also, are there types of lube and condoms you would recommend for someone who has never had intercourse before? Are there brands I should be wary of and stay away from? Are there some condoms that are more prone to breaking than others?

Thank you for the advice,
Have an awesome day!
Karyn
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Re: Embarassed to buy condoms

Unread post by Karyn »

Hey, Jellowl. It can feel embarrassing to buy condoms and lube (and like everyone's staring when you do!), but if it helps at all, cashiers tend not to remember anything about what people buy, and pretty much everyone else in any store is focused on what they're there for, not what other people are getting. (Personally, for instance, the last time I went into a pharmacy, I wasn't paying the least bit of attention to anyone else in the store or what they were purchasing.) Too, you might find it helps to go with someone for a bit of support: either your boyfriend or a friend, maybe? Plus, if you can get up the nerve to do it the first time, I can pretty much guarantee that you'll find it's not as bad as you've imagined, and that the next time will be easier.

Per what to buy, we have an article about the different types of condoms here: Your Map to the Condom Aisle. If you're not sure what kind your partner may prefer, and/or what your own preferences are, getting a sampler pack or a few boxes of different kinds can be a good way to find your favourites. The same goes for lube; different people prefer different things, but a water-based lube like Astroglide or KY Liquid is a fine place to start if you've never used any before.
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
Jellowl
not a newbie
Posts: 75
Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2016 6:54 am
Age: 24
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Re: Embarassed to buy condoms

Unread post by Jellowl »

Thank you for the advice, I feel a lot more confident now knowing that people won't really notice what I'm buying. So thanks for that :)

Also, may I have a quick review on the do's and don'ts of condom and lube combos please? I know there was a combination you were never supposed to use, though I can't remember it at the moment (Ack, I'm forgetful by nature)

Thanks, have a lovely night!
Karyn
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1407
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 3:00 pm
Age: 40
Awesomeness Quotient: I collect condoms.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Canada

Re: Embarassed to buy condoms

Unread post by Karyn »

You never want to use any kind of oil as a lubricant with latex condoms: oil degrades latex and makes it more likely that the condom will break. (Oil also degrades polyisoprene, which SKYN non-latex condoms are made of.) Generally, a water-based lubricant is your best bet: you can use it with any kind of condom and there are plenty of different brands readily available.
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
Jellowl
not a newbie
Posts: 75
Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2016 6:54 am
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm very chill and happy
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Straight
Location: North America

Re: Embarassed to buy condoms

Unread post by Jellowl »

Thanks again!

I just went and bought some condoms and lube and I will admit, it was a little daunting at first. I stood in the isle and awkwardly pretended not to look at the condoms. After a while, I thought of myself as being silly and went for it. There were so many to choose from that it slowed my progress a little. I decided on Durex extra thin, pre-lubed smooth condoms with liquid KY for lube. Hopefully that sounds like a good combo; the condoms are latex and the lube is latex friendly. As a quick question, lubrication while having intercourse can help the condom not break, correct?

Also, I was wondering what you do after you've used the lube for intercourse. I know you need a shower after to clean yourself up to stop any bad infections from starting. Does the lube eventually make it's way out of the vagina or do you have to take extra precautions when washing after?
Karyn
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1407
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 3:00 pm
Age: 40
Awesomeness Quotient: I collect condoms.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Canada

Re: Embarassed to buy condoms

Unread post by Karyn »

Yep, lube helps keep condoms from breaking by reducing friction, as well as helping everything feel better for the people involved, and it sounds like you've got a perfectly fine combination of condoms and lube there. If you need a refresher on proper condom use, by the way, we have on here: Condom Basics: A User's Manual

As far as what happens to lube after sex, there's no need to shower unless that's something you feel you want to do. A quick wipe with a tissue or damp washcloth is enough to take care of any lube on your vulva, and any that ends up inside your vagina will just work its way out with your usual vaginal discharge over time. In terms of preventing infections, the thing people with vaginas want to do after any kind of sex is to urinate, to flush out any bacteria that might have gotten pushed into the urethra, something that can lead to urinary tract infections.

Does that answer your questions?
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
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