I don't know what to do my boyfriend sexually assaulted me and he got arrested

[jonezy]

I am only 15 years old and I was sexually assaulted by my x boyfriend he was arrested but at school I am scared to turn the corner and I feel like what happened to me was my fault and all of his friends are saying that I should have just kept my mouth shut I don't know what do do I feel like I can't trust guys

[Heather]

Joneezy: welcome to the boards. I'm sorry this is what brought you here, but I'm glad you're here.

First of all, if you took action to seek safety and justice from the person who assaulted you, I want to commend you on your courage and self-care. It takes serious guts to do that, and I hope, even with all the typical conflict surrounding a report you're experiencing, you're giving yourself props for that.

You didn't rape yourself. This isn't your fault. The person whose fault it is is the person who chose to assault you. If they hadn't made that choice, you wouldn't have been assaulted. This is their doing and their fault, not yours.

I'm so sorry that his friends are harassing you: would you like to talk about what steps you can take with that to do what you can to either shut it down, get support with it, or both?

It's okay if right now you feel like you can't trust guys. Only this one guy assaulted you, and only the guys who are his friends harassed you, not all guys. However, it's not surprising you don't feel able to trust guys right now given these experiences, and that's okay. Who you trust is your choice and up to you. No one is entitled to our trust, so if, while you feel this way, you feel safer with people who aren't guys, and want to limit your interactions with guys, you get to do that.

It sounds like you feel very unsafe at school. Would you like help with that, too? Who can you talk to and go to in your life who you know always has your back? Are your parents or guardians supportive of you? How about a trusted teacher, coach or other staff at your school?