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I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Questions and discussions about gender, gender roles and identity.
KittyPink
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I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by KittyPink »

I have this happening a lot, from just being constantly bothered a bit by something (or none at all.), to full-blown phantom limbs. (Which is down-right scary when it comes on the first time, not to mention confusing.) Just like sometimes I'm comfortable touching down there, other times I'll get either upset, anxious, or just straight up avoid it out of bit of a feeling of disgust.
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship

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Sam W
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Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Kittypink,

What you're describing, especially having days where touching is fine and days where touching is a big old NOPE, is something plenty of people who experience dysphoria express. That doesn't make it any less unpleasant when it happens, but sometimes it can help to know you're not the only person who's ever dealt with that feeling.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
KittyPink
not a newbie
Posts: 378
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2016 2:11 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: I do art.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: Xe/Xir or She/her
Sexual identity: Lesbian, switch, polyam, rope addict.
Location: Parma,Ohio

Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by KittyPink »

Sam W wrote:Hi Kittypink,

What you're describing, especially having days where touching is fine and days where touching is a big old NOPE, is something plenty of people who experience dysphoria express. That doesn't make it any less unpleasant when it happens, but sometimes it can help to know you're not the only person who's ever dealt with that feeling.

With some of the stuff my mother says gets kind of upsetting when I'm in flux with dysphoria severity. Because I end up thinking just because it's in flux I'm making it up or that it isn't real.
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship

***Transfeminine***

LIVE AND LEARN
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
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Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by Sam W »

Something you could try is to have written down somewhere that having fluxes in dysphoria does not invalidate who you are. It can act like an affirmation from your past self to your future self.

You might also find this article helpful to have around. It's part of our Trans Summer School series, and addresses some of the feelings and fears you might be having: http://www.scarleteen.com/trans_summer_ ... ans_enough
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
KittyPink
not a newbie
Posts: 378
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2016 2:11 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: I do art.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: Xe/Xir or She/her
Sexual identity: Lesbian, switch, polyam, rope addict.
Location: Parma,Ohio

Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by KittyPink »

Sam W wrote:Something you could try is to have written down somewhere that having fluxes in dysphoria does not invalidate who you are. It can act like an affirmation from your past self to your future self.

You might also find this article helpful to have around. It's part of our Trans Summer School series, and addresses some of the feelings and fears you might be having: http://www.scarleteen.com/trans_summer_ ... ans_enough
The written down thing I should really start doing a lot.
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship

***Transfeminine***

LIVE AND LEARN
Karyn
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Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by Karyn »

Is journalling something you'd be interested in trying? As Sam said, it can be helpful to have reminders to yourself that fluxes in dysphoria don't invalidate your identity, but keeping an ongoing record of how you're feeling can be useful too, and journalling can serve that purpose (and it can just be a place to get your feelings out, which lots of folks find very beneficial).
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
KittyPink
not a newbie
Posts: 378
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2016 2:11 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: I do art.
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Location: Parma,Ohio

Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by KittyPink »

Long story about journaling, my grandmother took a few pages and I stopped after that.
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship

***Transfeminine***

LIVE AND LEARN
Karyn
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Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by Karyn »

Got it, and sorry for not checking in with you about something like that before making my suggestion: that was a big mistake on my part.
"Where there is power, there is resistance." -Michel Foucault
KittyPink
not a newbie
Posts: 378
Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2016 2:11 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: I do art.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: Xe/Xir or She/her
Sexual identity: Lesbian, switch, polyam, rope addict.
Location: Parma,Ohio

Re: I have varying degrees of dysphoria, solely random on the severity?

Unread post by KittyPink »

Karyn wrote:Got it, and sorry for not checking in with you about something like that before making my suggestion: that was a big mistake on my part.
Oh, it's fine. I'm thinking about starting to write things elsewhere, like how I'm writing some naughty stuff in a binder that she won't probably think of looking in.
"You are a dreamcatcher, you are beautiful to look at and you take the bad away and only give people the good." - Andrea Blankenship

***Transfeminine***

LIVE AND LEARN
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