Scarleteen

Hello there,

I'm 19, nearly 20, and back in August my partner and I had a missed miscarriage (didn't find out til our 12 weeks scan that it's pulse had stopped as I'd had no symptoms), and I really want to try again.
My partner however does, as his ex suffered from PND after their children, and he knows that with my state of mind after everything that's happened, the risk of triggering the same is increased, and so wants me to wait until I'm better. We both currently work, myself "part-time", although that is still a minimum of 30 hours a week, and I am doing my BSc in Psychology via distance learning. All I can think about is trying to have a child again, but I really amn't sure about whether it is the right time, as in my opinion it's the fact that we lost the child that has caused me so much upset, and part of me feels that being able to carry again would remove that low mood. Help!

Hi KMack,

I'm so sorry for your miscarriage, that can be an incredibly difficult thing to go through and everything you're feeling right now is understandable.


From your description, it sounds like giving yourself a little space and time to process what happened before trying again may be the best option, especially if your life is otherwise fairly hectic. Have you been able to access any in-person supports around what happened? That could be something like one on one counseling or a support group for people who've experienced miscarriages. A space like that could help you process everything you're feeling, and also give you a space to weigh the possibility of conceiving again.