Scarleteen

Hi there,

I was intimate with my boyfriend last night. I understand that there is a low possibility of getting pregnant from a 'condom flipping over' situation, assuming there is pre-cum on the outside. However, my scenario is a little different:

The condom was flipped over and he was 'poking' around my vagina, lightly pushed onto it a couple of times but never actually entered inside me. This is because while he was 'finding the entrance' I realised the potential risk of the flipped condom and demanded him to put a fresh one on before proceeding. He then changed the condom and we had protected sex with him pulling out before ejaculating.

I imagine this would make my chances of falling pregnant a little lower, however, I am wondering if there is any risk from the outside of the first condom (with potential pre-cum) being rubbed around my vagina? Could this pre-cum then be pushed in by the second, fresh condom? Or is there not really any need to worry?

Kind regards

Hey there, lemonpickle. I am not sure I understand what you are describing here.

Do you mean the condom was out on inside out? And if so, are you saying it was out on that way, but once you noticed, a fresh one was put on properly?

If so, nothing in that situation increases your risks or lowers the efficacy of the condom, nor would outting a condom on inside out somehow result in fluids inside it getting on the outside of it. It could have resulted in lower effectiveness or failure, had he ejaculated, or had the condom on wrong resulted in in breaking or falling off, but I do not hear you describing any of those things.

If I have got this all wrong per getting what happened here, let me know!

Hi, thank you for a quick response sorry to confuse you!

Basically, condom 1 was put on the wrong way round, it was flipped, put on the right way and he started rubbing it around my area but didn't enter.

I began to worry that there could be pre-cum on the condom, so we changed it and put a new condom one. It was only after that he entered inside me and eventually pulled out before ejaculating.

My concern was just whether any potential pre-cum from flipping the first one could have then been pushed into me after the new one was put on.

Also, before any of this happened, he had not ejaculated for days

Even if the condom was put on the wrong way, any of your partners fluids would still only be on the inside of that condom, just like when a condom is put on the right way round. If you had taken it off, turned it back round, and put that SAME condom back on, yep, this would be an issue. But that's not what you did, as I understand it, instead you put on a new condom entirely, which is what you're supposed to do.

Right?

Yes, the first condom was initially put on the wrong way round so we flipped it over and he rubbed around for a couple of minutes. But we put a new condom on before he entered inside me. So the new condom was used correctly.

The only risk I am worried about is that any pre-cum on the outside of the first condom, could have been rubbed around my vagina area before proceeding with the new condom.

Okay, so you DID take that first one and turn it inside out and reuse it for direct genital-to-genital contact?

In that case, yes, you have to figure your effectiveness per pregnancy and STIs may have been reduced, as that isn't proper use of a condom as you would have then been potentially exposed to your partner's fluids.

Yes the first one was flipped and used while he was rubbing outside, but he didn't enter inside while that one was on.

Is it safe to assume the chances are relatively low in this case? As the only real threat is from this pre-cum being 'pushed in and up' with the second, fresh condom?

I'm sorry, I'm still just having a very tough time being sure I have you right here.

Was there direct genital-to-genital contact -- between his penis and your vulva, whether or not he fully inserted his penis in your vagina or not -- while he was wearing the condom that was first put on inside out, and then taken off and not replaced, but just flipped over?

If so, then again, yes, this would potentially reduce the efficacy of your condom per both pregnancy and STIs. If we did not ejaculate, then figure you used withdrawal properly, but NOT condoms properly in sorting out where you want to take this from here (basically, if you want to use Plan B or not, as that's all there is to do at this point).

Yes, you have it spot on there.

Thank you, I wasn't sure if the risk would be higher had he actually have entered with pre-cum on the tip rather than it just being on the outside. As I imagine it would make the journey/survival rate for the pre-cum a little harder.

Ultimately, the vaginal opening and the vulva are two parts of a whole we can't really separate when we talk about pregnancy and STI risks, especially since I don't know of any studies that have been done to look at how much of a difference, if any, it makes in people not having fertility issues to be this-far or that-far into the vagina, or all the way inside the vagina or just "poking," as you say.

So, that's why we instead talk about if there was or was not direct genital-to-genital contact, because we know that that is what presents these risks and what we can address soundly with information we do have.

But pre-ejaculate isn't something with a survival rate or not: viability is something to talk about with sperm cells, not semen or pre-ejaculate. Pre-ejaculate often won't even have any sperm cells in it, which is why I mentioned the fact that you used withdrawal, which can be effective in preventing pregnancy, expressly because pre-ejaculate often does not have sperm cells in it, and when it does, they are the trace cells, the ones that basically were the worst swimmers, as it were, of a previous ejaculation.

So, in making choices here, with the STIs, all you can do is both stay current with testing, which everyone should be doing regardless. With pregnancy, figure you had the perfect-use rate of effectiveness for withdrawal (which is estimated to be around 96% effective in one year of use), and probably the typical use rate for a condom (which is around 85% in one year). And if you don't feel okay with that, or would feel better with some extra protection, you probably will want to use Plan B.

Sorry it took so long for me to understand you, btw! Didn't mean to give you any kind of runaround there.

Ah, thank you so much for explaining all of that, I'm happy with the 96% withdrawal rate alone, so combined with the with the typical condom use rate I feel fine to just wait for my period now.

No problem, it probably would have been much easier if I had just explained it that way to begin with! Haha

I cannot thank you enough for your help, especially considering it is almost midnight here in the UK.

Thank you