Scarleteen

How has your significant other helped you love your body, and how have you helped them love theirs?

For me, I've always been really self-conscious of my stomach. Back a few years ago, I had an eating disorder and I exercised constantly--obsessing over my lack of a perfectly-flat belly. When over-exercise and dieting didn't result in perfection, I started cutting my belly as some form of perverse "punishment."
Fast forward to today, and the eating disorder & self harm are in the past. However, I still feel self-conscious about the way my belly bulges after a big meal, and I have scars there from the self harm. Yet, the very things I dislike about my belly--its softness, the way it bulges a little bit--are the things my boyfriend loves. He always wants to touch my belly, and I am starting to realize there's nothing "flawed" about having a little belly fat.
I have been blessed, to be able to return the favor to my boyfriend. He has always been self-conscious about his figure. He is very skinny. In addition, due to health problems, he has to take a medicine called Prednisone periodically. When he is on the Prednisone, he gains weight very rapidly, and the fat all accumulates in his belly and cheeks (common side effects of the drug). I have had the opportunity, during these times, to challenge his discomfort with how his belly looks--much the same as he has challenged mine. Being on both sides of this divide has really helped me, and him, challenge our self-criticisms.

I've always thought that my body just "needed improvement". I have a bit of a stomach and a little bit of man boob, but I've never really felt uncomfortable as long as I was alone. Last Saturday my girlfriend and I showed each other our bodies and it was a really nice experience. She loved all my stretch marks and loves to rest on my stomach, admitting she likes chubby boys. I also told her that she was beautiful as she was, although she never felt that way.
Being with her really made me comfortable with how I look, and I feel that sharing bodily insecurities with a partner is an incredibly positive experience.

I'd always felt inadequate due to my small chest (30B? I don't exactly know my size). Never felt comfortable with getting to second base with guys. That is, until, I met my man. Once when we were making out, he asked me if it was okay with me if he took my shirt off. Whenever guys asked me this question, I would freak out and say no. I would actually be dying to feel their hands under my shirt but I had been ashamed of my tiny chest and afraid it would turn them off. But when he asked me, I finally plucked up the courage to talk about my breasts, because I had finally learned that communication was the key.The conversation went something like this:
Me: Well, there's nothing much up there for you to feel
Him:(smiling)I'm satisfied with whatever you've got".
I wasn't convinced very much but we continued but suddenly, I blurted out, Me: Do you like big boobs?
Him:(Puzzled) Yeah, I do. What's all this about?
Me:(Looking crestfallen)
Him:(Realizing I have a problem with my breast size) Hey, baby, look, I'm not gonna lie and say that I hate big boobs and have been dying to feel a pair of small breasts to make you feel good, because I don't believe you can truly love your small breasts by dissing big ones. I love you, and all I want is you to love me always like you do now. Yeah, your breasts are small, but so what? They are a part of you and and I love every single bit of you. Okay?
Me:(stunned) You're a saint.
We laughed it off but it took me some more days to make complete peace with my boobs. He even jokes about them now and then but I never get offended anymore, I enjoy them. It's just like the way I joke about his (weirdly coarse) hair. They're both body parts, so why the disparity?
(I know the convo sounds a bit dramatic, but that's how it happened, and I love him for it)