want to be pregnant

[erinmer]

I'm only 14 years old, not in a relationship and inexplicably want to be pregnant! I will not act on this urge until I am an adult, probably married and in a position to have children. I dont even want to be pregnant for the sake of having a child, for some reason I just really want to go through a pregnancy!! I've tried doing research on pregnancy to show myself the stark reality but for some reason that only makes me wish i were pregnant even more... for some reason it seems like fun to me?? I feel really bad wanting to be pregnant because i know it's so hard and it's not really an experience known for being enjoyable but I want to know why i feel this way and what to do!! Can i blame this on a weird motherly instinct? Sometimes i don't even know if i can wait to be an adult even though i will, but i just want so badly to be pregnant. Help!! advice needed.

[Karyn]

Hi erinmer, welcome to the boards.

I'd say it's pretty natural to be curious about and interested in experiencing something like pregnancy, just like you might be curious about any significant physical experience. It does sound like this want is stressing you out a bit though, and thinking about it is occupying a lot of your time, so to figure out what to do about it, maybe it would be useful to narrow down what it is about pregnancy that you want to experience: what is it about being pregnant that sounds like fun to you?

(I will say that if this want is becoming something you really can't stop thinking about to the point that it's interfering with you going about your life as usual, then that's something to talk to a therapist or counsellor about.)

[erinmer]

Hi erinmer, welcome to the boards.

I'd say it's pretty natural to be curious about and interested in experiencing something like pregnancy, just like you might be curious about any significant physical experience. It does sound like this want is stressing you out a bit though, and thinking about it is occupying a lot of your time, so to figure out what to do about it, maybe it would be useful to narrow down what it is about pregnancy that you want to experience: what is it about being pregnant that sounds like fun to you?

(I will say that if this want is becoming something you really can't stop thinking about to the point that it's interfering with you going about your life as usual, then that's something to talk to a therapist or counsellor about.)

Not sure if I'm replying correctly let's hope I am...
Thanks for the fast response! I can't quite pinpoint what aspect of pregnancy seems like fun. I guess something about the whole experience of it, with all the side effects and such, makes it seem like fun to me for some reason. Since the outcome of a child outweighs all the negatives of it (for the most part) it seems worthwhile. That doesn't make sense to me though since I'm not really interested in having kids, it's only the pregnancy part that interests me. Back to that, it just seems fun to me to go through pregnancy, which is as simply as i can try to put it. Wanting to be pregnant is more of a recurring thought than anything, and its only now taking up my time while i'm on a break from school. I've just always wondered why being pregnant seems so appealing to me. Do you think there's any sort of weird female/hormonal reason for me wanting to be pregnant? Really looking for excuses now. Thanks again for the response!

[Karyn]

Thanks for elaborating! To be honest, I'm not sure what else to tell you here (hopefully one of our other staffers will have something more helpful to contribute at some point!). If it's just something that occurs to you every so often though I wouldn't spend too much time stressing about it.

[Mo]

I don't know that we can for sure say why you're feeling this desire to experience pregnancy. I wouldn't attribute it solely to your hormones or gender; there are certainly women & others who can become pregnant who aren't interested, and men & others who can't become pregnant who would really love to have that experience. Both pregnancy and parenting are things that some people have really strong feelings about and others barely think about at all - like most things in life, I suppose!

You mention doing some research on pregnancy, but I'm wondering if you've had conversations in person with people who were pregnant? If there are family members, friends, or other people you're at all friendly with who are pregnant or have experienced pregnancy recently, they might be willing to talk about their experiences and answer questions that you have. That might give you a bit more personal insight than reading information or experiences elsewhere would, and you might find that helpful or enjoyable. It's important to check in with someone about whether they're willing to talk about their experience with pregnancy, and what sorts of questions they are and aren't comfortable with, but if they're up for it I think it could be useful.

[erinmer]

I don't know that we can for sure say why you're feeling this desire to experience pregnancy. I wouldn't attribute it solely to your hormones or gender; there are certainly women & others who can become pregnant who aren't interested, and men & others who can't become pregnant who would really love to have that experience. Both pregnancy and parenting are things that some people have really strong feelings about and others barely think about at all - like most things in life, I suppose!

You mention doing some research on pregnancy, but I'm wondering if you've had conversations in person with people who were pregnant? If there are family members, friends, or other people you're at all friendly with who are pregnant or have experienced pregnancy recently, they might be willing to talk about their experiences and answer questions that you have. That might give you a bit more personal insight than reading information or experiences elsewhere would, and you might find that helpful or enjoyable. It's important to check in with someone about whether they're willing to talk about their experience with pregnancy, and what sorts of questions they are and aren't comfortable with, but if they're up for it I think it could be useful.

First off, thanks so much for responding! This is my first real experience with this website and it's been so great, the staff is so helpful. I've gotten more responses than I could even have hoped for!

I've talked many times before to my mother about her pregnancies with my siblings and me, but mostly for the sake of the stories and not so much my interest in pregnancy. I definitely think I'll talk to her more since she's my mother and all, we live together so it's more practical. I've noticed that my interest in pregnancy really peaked at the beginning of this week when I first started doing somewhat obsessive research but by now I've exhausted most of my sources. Still sometimes I'll find myself reaching for my phone when some sort of pregnancy related search topic comes to mind. I think i've mentioned before that a huge factor in my interest seems to be that i'm currently on break from school which has given me more time to just sit around and research. Once class starts back up in a couple of days I'm guessing this will all be old news. Still, the fact that from time to time my interest in pregnancy comes back in full swing has left me curious and all the advice I've gotten might help me get to the bottom of all this. I'll definitely try talking to my mother, maybe others too. Can't thank you enough!