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I can only "O" on top..

Questions and discussion about your sexual lives, choices, activities, ideas and experiences.
Taylor18
not a newbie
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Joined: Mon Jun 05, 2017 8:34 pm
Age: 25
Awesomeness Quotient: Open minded
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She/her
Sexual identity: Bisexual
Location: Pennsylvania

I can only "O" on top..

Unread post by Taylor18 »

It seems I can only orgasm when I'm on top and I have clitoral stimulation from rubbing against my partner. Ive never really had a vaginal orgasm besides squirting once or twice but its so hard to make happen, takes forever, and doesnt feel as good as a clitoral orgasm. At least thats what i remember- and I seem to have just "gotten lucky" those two times because I haven't gotten myself to do it again and when I try it just isn't pleasurable. But when I am on top it Usually it takes too long and my partner finishes before me and I'm left unsatisfied. I feel like I've tried everything, vibrators, stimulating by hand, but nothing else works. Any advice or similar expierences? I just hate being left unsatisfied and frustrated.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9687
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
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Location: Chicago

Re: I can only "O" on top..

Unread post by Heather »

So, there actually isn't such a thing as a "vaginal orgasm" or a "clitoral orgasm," because ALL orgasm is something that happens in the brain and central nervous system, but has effects we can feel genitally, and is something which genital stimulation often causes for people.

More on that here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... frameworks

And also here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... _conundrum

What works for people with orgasm is what works for people. It's pretty individual and no one bunch of things that work are better or more right or wrong than another. Why not just go with what does work for you? Why push to make things work for you that for now clearly aren't the ticket, or only do those things so long as you enjoy them, without trying to make them result in orgasm?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
AskAubrey
newbie
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Location: Prague, Czech Republic

Re: I can only "O" on top..

Unread post by AskAubrey »

Hey, Taylor,

I've had lots of similar "O" frustration, but if there's one thing I've discovered, it's that stressing about it during sex can make it harder to climax. While having an orgasm is (let's be honest) an incredible sensation, some of the best sex I've had has been without an orgasm for me or my partner. Mutual masturbation, deep kissing, dry humping, and plenty of other sexy stuff, WITHOUT the expectation of an orgasm can so pleasurable, AND, can also be a great way of relaxing your body and mind, which is, for me, the most important factor in getting that "O".

Take your time, be in the moment, have fun, and be safe!

xx
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