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Problem/No problem... Help!

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 2:49 pm
by Lyricrocks
Hello. So, to start off; I'm a 15 year old female, a virgin, and new to Scarleteen, so please no hating.. Thanks.

Anyways, I've been masturbating for a while and something new (and wierd/scary) happens, almost every time. Right before, during, and after orgasm, I shake really badly. Lately, I have been experiencing a minute or two long 'black-out' after my orgasm. What's your opinion on this? Everything I've read on google seems to say that it's perfectly normal and super sexy. One problem ------ IT SCARES ME!
I'm in a long distance relationship, so it's not like I really have anyone there to hold me or be with me when it happens and I get really nervous.. Like, I'm pretty much done masturbating for a while because it makes me so nervous. I've told my boyfriend about this, and he says it's hot too, but... I really don't know what to do, so I'd kinda like to see what other people think...


Thanks..












Re: Problem/No problem... Help!

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 3:05 pm
by Mo
Hi Lyricrocks, and welcome to Scarleteen. No worries, we are a no hating zone. :)

Some people to experience shaking/muscle contractions during and just before/after orgasm. It's pretty common for people to clench or contract muscles during sexual activity or orgasm; if you notice that you're doing this you may be able to make an effort to not do it or do it less, and that might help.

It isn't unusual or dangerous to experience this, but if you don't think it's sexy, it's ok to not feel sexy about it.

Re: Problem/No problem... Help!

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 7:18 pm
by Lyricrocks
Hi Mo,

Thanks for the quick response... I'm not really sure how else I feel about it, other than nervous.. I guess the shaking could be a little sexy; but the black out?
Hmmm....

Re: Problem/No problem... Help!

Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2014 7:29 pm
by Sam W
Hi Lyrics,

I do want to put out there that, even if there's no one physically there to comfort you, you might be able to either work out some self-comforting stuff that helps you feel okay, or some way of reaching out to your boyfriend for support via text or similar.

But beyond that, if you're finding this draining or nerve-wracking, there's no law that says you have to keep doing it. If you want to take a break from masturbating, you get to do that. As Mo said, the shaking/clenching is pretty common, so you might find that you do get used to it over time as it becomes a "this is how my body reacts to this and that's that" and less of a "holy cow what the heck was that" feeling.

Also, when you say black-outs, do you mean you literally pass out, or something different?

Re: Problem/No problem... Help!

Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 1:46 pm
by Kaizen
Hey, Lyric, I just wanted to jump in and check something with you.

Did you tell your boyfriend that this is something that scares you and that you don't like it (not just that it's a thing that happens)?

If not, I would totally recommend that you do so that, like Sam said, you can work out some way he can support you, if you'd like that, and at least so that he'll know how you really feel about it.

If you did present it to him that way, then his having that reaction of telling you it's "hot" doesn't sit so well with me.

Re: Problem/No problem... Help!

Posted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 2:02 pm
by Heather
Just to be clear, if you are, in fact, blacking out, then that is something to check in with a doctor about, just to be sure everything is okay. It may be you're not, you are just experiencing orgasm in a way that makes you feel like you are (and you can check that, I'd say, if you're not sure, by looking at a clock -- not so sexy, I know, but you should only have to do it the once -- as your orgasm starts, then looking after those times that feel like blackouts to see if you really are losing more than a minute or two), but bonafide blackouts should always be looked into.