Do I leave?
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usnavihamilton
- newbie
- Posts: 1
- Joined: Sat Jan 13, 2018 11:04 pm
- Age: 23
- Awesomeness Quotient: My love for Broadway.
- Primary language: English.
- Pronouns: She
- Sexual identity: Pansexual
- Location: Florida
Do I leave?
Well, I've been in this relationship with this guy for about 11 months. But when I moved, the spark we had left. I had stayed in the relationship for him because he needed the support. But now this relationship is hurting me physically and mentally. I've been so stressed about it that I throw up everything I eat and I can't even think straight. And I've told him to give me a break so I could think and he continues to call me and text me. A friend of mine told me to call the police because what he's doing is harassment but I think that he's so stressed out that he's doesn't get what he's doing. And I know that he's not trying to harm me. But I need to get out of this, or I'm going to lose my mind. So, what do I do?
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Sam W
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
- Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
- Age: 33
- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: queer
- Location: Coast
Re: Do I leave?
Hi usnavihamilton,
This sounds like a really stressful situation, and it sounds like you already know that the best thing to do for yourself is to end the relationship. Since the thing that is causing you the most immediate distress is him continuing to contact you even after you set a boundary (which, no matter his reasons for doing it, is definitely a red flag), it sounds like the next step is to do somethings to make that boundary even firmer, and then we can move into a conversation about how to fully get out of this relationship. Do you have a way to block his calls and texts, as well as things like emails and social media messages that he might try to send you? And if you were to do that, do you have any sense of whether or not he would try to escalate his behavior?
This sounds like a really stressful situation, and it sounds like you already know that the best thing to do for yourself is to end the relationship. Since the thing that is causing you the most immediate distress is him continuing to contact you even after you set a boundary (which, no matter his reasons for doing it, is definitely a red flag), it sounds like the next step is to do somethings to make that boundary even firmer, and then we can move into a conversation about how to fully get out of this relationship. Do you have a way to block his calls and texts, as well as things like emails and social media messages that he might try to send you? And if you were to do that, do you have any sense of whether or not he would try to escalate his behavior?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.