Vaginal penetration issues

Questions and discussions about your bodies and their parts.
Sistine
not a newbie
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Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2018 10:05 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: Curiosity
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Sexual identity: Bi
Location: California

Vaginal penetration issues

Unread post by Sistine »

I am interested losing my virginity, although I don't want it to be painful. When I masturbate, I noticed that I can barely get three fingers in, (on another note I've never been able to get a menstrual cup in). I noticed someone recently posted a topic similar to this, although I have an anatomy related question. When three fingers are in, I noticed that the reason I can't get more in is because of a piece of skin that goes around the inside in an o shape, at it is very taught. I tired figuring out by reading vaginal anatomy websites, but none of them mentioned this. I thought it might be my hymen, but it seems based on what I read that hymens are thin membranes that are easily broken, but whatever I have seems very strong. So what I'm wondering is what is it and how do I get it to be wider.
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
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Location: Coast

Re: Vaginal penetration issues

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Sistine,

While we can't say for certain what you're feeling, although it does sound like it might be your vaginal corona (which is another name for the hymen). While the vaginal corona is a flexible membrane rather than a brittle one (it doesn't actually break in the way that many people assume it does), some people have one that's on the thicker side, or one that's not all the way worn away when they first encounter it. You can get a sense of what the Corona looks and feels like here: My Corona: The Anatomy Formerly Known as the Hymen & the Myths That Surround It . Have you ever done a self-exam with a mirror to see if that helped you figure out what you were feeling? And have you had a visit with an OB-GYN?

Too, it may help to know that painful sex, whether that's vaginal intercourse or something like manual sex, has a lot more to do with things like communication, relaxation, and lubrication than anything else. You can read all about why that is here: From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
Sistine
not a newbie
Posts: 7
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2018 10:05 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: Curiosity
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She her
Sexual identity: Bi
Location: California

Re: Vaginal penetration issues

Unread post by Sistine »

Thank you so much! This was really helpful.
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Vaginal penetration issues

Unread post by Sam W »

You're welcome, I'm glad it helped!
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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