Scarleteen

Hello! I'm going to get straight to the point.

My girlfriend and I have been having sex regularly one or two times a week, sometimes more if we get to see each other more then normal. The problem we are having is my random inability to climax/ejaculate. About half the time we are fine and everything goes normally, but the other half I seem to fall short. So here is what happens:

Everything goes fine, we are enjoying everything, and everything feels great. Then I will randomly lose all sensation/feeling in my penis. Because of this, it will cause me to either take a longer time to climax or not climax at all. When this happens, I do not lose my erection.

In the past I found out that one of my ex girlfriends was making fun of the size of my penis behind my back. For a long time I took a huge hit to my self-esteem. It took me a long time to get my self-esteem back but I did it and I have confidence during sex again, however, sometimes the thought still comes to mind during sex and it can cause me to lose my erection. This is a problem that I have gone to the doctor about and it is something that I have to get over mentally, I understand that. Though this still comes up every once in a while, it is not really the problem, but I wanted to mention it so you have all the details.

I also want to add, in case these details matter as well, that it has always taken me a long time to climax during sex. Between 45 minutes and up to 2 hours. Recently I have hit around that 2 hour mark and still not been able to climax during these random times. I am very confident in my ability. My girlfriend reaches climax multiple times. I am very attracted to her physically and mentally. I have no problem getting/keeping an erection around her. I also find our sex life exciting and thrilling (she feels the same way). About half the time, or a little more then half, everything goes perfectly normal, climax and all. We use Trojan Bare Skin condoms and she is planning on getting on birth control soon.

What can be causing my random inability to climax and random lack of sensation/feeling in my penis? Could it be my diet or possibly stress related?

Thank you all!

Hi Vesper, and welcome to Scarleteen!

That sounds like it could be a frustrating issue, and it's definitely unusual to have erections last for that long. You mention having spoken to a healthcare provider before about losing your erection. Have you also spoken to one about the erections that last a long time and the fact that you lose sensation in your penis for those periods of time?

Sam W wrote:Hi Vesper, and welcome to Scarleteen!

That sounds like it could be a frustrating issue, and it's definitely unusual to have erections last for that long. You mention having spoken to a healthcare provider before about losing your erection. Have you also spoken to one about the erections that last a long time and the fact that you lose sensation in your penis for those periods of time?

Hi Sam! Thank you!

I have not spoken with a healthcare provider about my erections lasting as long as they do. Though I knew it was uncommon, I did not know that could be an issue. I have also not spoken with one about the loss in sensation because it is a new problem. I have thought about contacting my doctor about it but I wanted to post on here first and see what kind of feedback I got.

Hi Vesper,

It sounds like making an appointment with your healthcare provider would be a good first step, what you're describing is certainly unusual. Feel free to come back and talk with us some more when you've had their advice

Siân wrote:Hi Vesper,

It sounds like making an appointment with your healthcare provider would be a good first step, what you're describing is certainly unusual. Feel free to come back and talk with us some more when you've had their advice

Hi,

Thank you for your feedback. I will set up an appointment!

Great!