masturbation doesn’t feel good, or bad

[wowie hiya]

heya i dont know if this isn’t the right place for this but I hope so

anyways, I’ve tried a couple ways of masturbating- clit stimulating, inserting a finger(which actually kind of hurts) and just kind of rubbing my vagina on cloth. They don’t really feel good, most of the time it doesn’t hurt. I just wonder if I’m not as sensitive or maybe I’m just not trying enough?

[Sam W]

Hi Wowie hiya,

If it helps to know, you're certainly not the first person to come to us asking about this sort of problem. Sometimes it's a matter of experimenting even more until you find things that feel pleasurable to you. If you haven't looked at it yet, this article may have some useful tips for you: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... feel_weird

Can you give me a sense of if you're mentally turned on as well as physically turned on before you start masturbating and during masturbation?

[wowie hiya]

Hi Wowie hiya,

If it helps to know, you're certainly not the first person to come to us asking about this sort of problem. Sometimes it's a matter of experimenting even more until you find things that feel pleasurable to you. If you haven't looked at it yet, this article may have some useful tips for you: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advic ... feel_weird

Can you give me a sense of if you're mentally turned on as well as physically turned on before you start masturbating and during masturbation?

well, I’m usually physically turned on but I don’t know about mentally turned on during masturbation because I usually focus on what feels good and what doesn’t, but nothing really feels good or bad.

[phantomdog]

hey,

something that could help is to just relax and think about things that turn you on to get yourself going physically and mentally. this can make masturbation much more enjoyable. another thing: focusing too much on what feels good or bad can cause that lack of sensation at all - it's better to just focus on erotic thoughts and trust yourself to go from there. hope this helps!

[Sam W]

Thanks for elaborating wowie hiya! The reason I ask about whether you're mentally aroused when masturbating is that the brain is the biggest sexual organ (you can read all about that here: With Pleasure: A View of Whole Sexual Anatomy for Every Body ). So if it's not super engaged in, and excited about, what's going during masturbation things might not be that pleasurable. If you're body is going through the motions of masturbation but your brain is somewhere else, then those motions may not feel super interesting. Some ways that people get mentally aroused before and during masturbation include fantasizing or consuming some kind of sexual media. Does that all make sense?

You may also want to check out this new article! http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodie ... sturbation . It covers of few of the things you've mentioned in this thread and some of the advice in it may be helpful to you.