Scarleteen

I went to a party from day 26 to 27 and i drank and smoked a bit but im pretty sure i remember everything that happened during that night, but i made out with a boy (got to like 2nd base) and Im really panicking. This was probably at around 5 am on the 27th and im scared i might have also had intercourse and not remembering it, and I've asked the boy and he said we didn't but im still panicking, and i remember what i did and im 99% sure i didnt take my pants off but the more i rethink the situation in my head the more nervous i get and my period is supposed to come next month (around day 7) and i know im not going to be able to stop stressing until then, even though its probably all in my head. And I'm a virgin so there would be signs if I did do it wouldnt there? What do I do?

Hi there Dont know, welcome to Scarleteen. This sounds like a stressful situation, for sure.
Do you know if the boy you were with was drinking as well, and are there are parts of the evening he doesn't remember? Is he someone you generally feel you can trust? It sounds like you feel fairly sure you haven't forgotten anything and didn't black out but are worried there's a period of time you aren't aware you forgot; is that the case?

If you were noticing any soreness or tenderness in your vagina or vulva that could be a sign that something did happen; if there isn't any, it's less likely, although we can't say for sure just based on that. If it would help you feel better and you have access to it, you could take emergency contraception now; you're still within the window of time when it could be helpful at preventing pregnancy in case there was a risk. It looks like it is available over the counter in Portugal.

I don't feel any soreness or tenderness, and i think he remembers everything but I don't trust him that much. And I can only get the pill with the family docter, but its closed until wednesday, and I don't think I'm old enough to get it at a pharmacy.

Hi Dont know,

The info I'm seeing says that there is no age restriction on accessing emergency contraception in Portugal, and that you should be able to get it from a doctor's clinic, a pharmacy or an emergency room. Do you want to give it a try?

I'm sorry that this is feeling so stressful. From what you remember and describe, there's a good chance you didn't have intercourse but unfortunately I can't tell you for certain. Do you want to talk about why this feels so scary?

I just want to add that it sounds to me like what's probably going on here is that your anxiety is getting the better of you. Your first post to me sounds like you DO actually have a handle on what happened, and that perhaps some conflicted feelings about all your choices have got your mind spinning out.

Can you do some things this weekend to take care of yourself and your feelings? Some things that you know from experience make you more calm and comfortable when you're freaking out about something?

I wonder if it might help to talk about how to make different choices moving forward so that you can feel better about things like this in the future? That might mean making the choice to only be sexual with someone else when you're sober (or more sober, which is always a good idea, honestly), or it might be about only going to things like this with a friend or two so that you have someone you DO trust who can help keep an eye on you and pull you out of what they think look like any iffy situations. What do you think about that?

I tried to go to my family doctor to speak with her about this, but it was already closed when I got there and now it will only be open on wednesday, and I can't afford buying them at a farmacy. It feels really stressful because I'm not alowed to drink, but i do it anyways but never too much and I wasn't drunk enough to not remember something like that but I'm still really concerned, and if anything did happen and I get pregnant or something how could I ever tell my parents? They trusted in me and I'm a terrible daughter. And I've been really overwhelmed with everything lately and I don't think I can do anything about this. And I've been trying to distract myself but nothing works...

Before I say more, why don't you fill me in on how you're doing today, since it's been a day since you posted and last you did, you were having a hard time managing your stress and anxiety?