Scarleteen

** I'm not 100% sure if I'm posting in the right message board. If not I apologise. Just let me know what message forum it belongs on. **

I've struggled with body dysmorphia my whole life. I lost 100 lbs in a few years. Over the past year I gained 30 back but kept a good shape the rest of my body.

My initial motive for weight loss was to fit in, essentially with the men. It worked. Even now I get male attention but I'm less satisfied than before. I'm on a new fitness/nutrition program to lose those lbs I've gained so I can go back to being the way I was when I was lighter. To be honest I just love being light and thin. I feel that it outweighs all my other flaws. If I'm (what I feel is considered) chubby (to me) I identify as a skinny girl trapped in a fat suit.

Don't get me wrong, I'm cool with other people of all shapes and sizes. I'm a people person, but it's myself that I have standards for. I admit that I have a problem with my self esteem. So I was wondering if anyone on here knew of any online organisations for people with self esteem issues and body dysmorphia?

Hi there,

I'm sorry that you're struggling with self esteem. Is this something you've ever had the support of a counselor or therapist for?

If I'm honest, the way your describing your body it sounds like you're judging it according to how you feel it should look, rather than valuing it for what it feels like to live in, or the things it can do. What if you put all the energy you've committed to changing your body into accepting it for how it is?

Sam wrote a lovely advice column here, on Why the Ugly Duckling is a Rubbish Story. which has a bunch of links in you can click through. What do you think?

If you're looking for additional online resources, you could try a web search for "body positivity", or check out the weight and size section of hebodyisnotanapology.com. Does that help?