Scarleteen

My twin brother and I are both juniors in high school, but have yet to go out on a single date. I don't know why. He's a really good looking guy and both my girl and guy friends tell me I'm pretty. But for whatever reason, it's just not happening.

Anyway, one weekend night we were home alone, watching a movie, and complaining to one another about our situation. I admitted that I'd never even kissed a guy before. We turned and exchanged a look. That night we decided to kiss as an experiment, just to see what it's like. I don't think either of us expected to enjoy it as much as we did.

This happened a few months ago. And it wasn't a one time thing. And we keep pushing the boundaries further each time. We haven't had sex, because we're not sure we want to cross that line. But we have done plenty of kissing, groping, and dry humping.

My brother has been my best friend since we were little. I guess it's fair to say that we're now friends with benefits. I feel really conflicted. When we do stuff together, it always feels good but I always feel guilty afterwards. He recently told me that he'd read somewhere that experimentation among twins actually isn't that uncommon and that we should just relax and enjoy it. He assured me it's not that big a deal.

I don't know if that's true or if he's just saying what he hopes is true. I can't talk to my parents or anyone about this. How normal is this? Are we sick? I hate feeling torn like this. Please advise!

Sexual activity between family members is often traumatic in the long-term for those involved and is also typically abuse. As with any kind of possible abuse or trauma, it's important to talk to someone who can provide the kind of help needed in this situation. You could start by telling a parent, guardian or other adult family member, or, if you don't feel safe doing that, we can help you look for a local safe resource for that help. Would you like our help with that?