Losing my virginity

[Soccergal71]

So 2 days ago I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. I was ready but now I am experiencing pain and bleeding. When we engaged in PIV I had him stop because it was too painful. I just ended my period the day we had sex and I bleed quite a bit during intercourse. I know that is from my hymn breaking but I thought the bleeding would stop. Now I have red bleeding and pain to touch. Is this normal? I’ve tried looking up answers online but I’m still confused and I can’t go to my parents because they believe in waiting until marriage

[Alice M]

Hi and welcome to Scarleteen.

I'm sorry to hear that you're dealing with this. My first question is: what was this intercourse like for you? Did you use lubricant, go slowly, feel relaxed and aroused? Pain signals are helpful, in that they alert us to needing to stop or slow down and reassess what is causing us pain. I'm glad to hear that you felt ready, that's a great start.

Here are two places to begin reading and get some ideas about what happened and how you'd like to proceed in the future:

One Bloody Mess: Myths & Realities Of Bleeding With First Time Intercourse

From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse

We are not doctors here so we cannot diagnose your pain or your bleeding. If the pain continues then I'd recommend that you see a doctor.

[Soccergal71]

We didn’t use lubricant but I was aroused. I however I was very nervous but told him to go slow and he did.

[Sam W]

I'm glad to hear you two communicated about when you needed him to go slow. As for lube, even when someone is aroused, they may still need additional lubricant to help sex feel comfortable. So, if you two are planning on doing this again, you'll want to get some lube. Is that something you have access to?

Since you mentioned it in your first post, it may also help to know that the hymen, or vaginal corona, isn't something that breaks, although it can experience tears. You can read more about that here: My Corona: The Anatomy Formerly Known as the Hymen & the Myths That Surround It.