Bleeding days after losing virginity

[LmPark]

I lost my virginity very casually on Tuesday, and didn’t experience any discomfort or bleeding if my hymen had broken. On Friday it kind of hurt to use the restroom, yesterday it seemed like I was spotting, and today (Sunday) I’ve been seeing blood.

I assume it’s because my hymen was broken, but is it normal to start bleeding days after losing virginity? And will it just go away in a few days?

[al]

Hi there LmPark, and welcome to Scarleteen!

The combination of pain afterwards and spotting/bleeding suggests that things might have been a bit too much for your body on Tuesday. The tissue of the vulva and the vagina are pretty delicate, so they can get damaged if a) there isn't enough lubrication (either that you made or that was added in), b) you're not feeling relaxed and aroused, and/or c) things are going too fast/too rough. But I can't say for sure, because I'm not a doctor and this is the internet! If it's something that persists and doesn't get better, you should definitely check in with a healthcare provider about it.

You mentioned potentially having "broken" your hymen - you might find it really helpful to browse through My Corona: The Anatomy Formerly Known As the Hymen and The Myths That Surround It. Hymens being a piece of tissue that magically breaks apart during intercourse is one of a couple of different myths surrounding someone's first time that are built on some really restrictive ideas. Soreness, pain, and bleeding are usually signals that we get from our bodies that something's not right! But unfortunately a lot of folks grow up with the narrative that those things come with the package of the first time.

Other than what you've mentioned, how else are you feeling about that experience! Was that partner respectful of your boundaries? Did you enjoy yourself? What about any kinds of conversations or actions taken about any possibility of pregnancy and/or STI transmission?

[LmPark]

Yeah he was, and I did enjoy it. It was a little rough and moved pretty fast, so that makes sense. The only kind of lubricant that was used was from me, and saliva so that probably has a role in it.

As far as conversations or actions taken, he didn’t have an STI. Or at least he told me he didn’t have one. I haven’t done anything to take any action towards either situation, mostly because my lack of funds towards anything.

I’ve been kind of panicking about the possibility I may be pregnant. We did have sex while I was ovulating without protection... I haven’t been feeling the best as of late, kind of sick feeling, a little gross, super congested or running nose. There isn’t an in between, and I keep sneezing. But “downstairs” hurts a tiny bit occasionally as well as my lower abdomen. And I kind of have a bad feeling that I could possibly be, but I’m hoping I’m just psyching myself out.

[al]

Hi Lm,

The symptoms that you're describing aren't something you would experience if you had just become pregnant; more likely you're coming down with a cold or allergies, or something like that. Most people don't even experience something feeling different for at least a few weeks, because the fertilized egg is in its very first stages of stabilizing itself and taking up residence in the uterus.

If the person you were with ejaculated inside of you without using a condom, there was potentially a risk for pregnancy. If it's been less than 120 hours since then, I would suggest taking emergency contraception like Plan B to lessen that risk, but it's probably been more than that amount of time if it was 5 days ago. Instead, the most helpful thing to do now would be to read through the Pregnancy Panic Companion that we've created exactly for situations like this one.
If this is making you feel anxious or upset to think about, Self-Care A La Carte has some great suggestions for how you can take care of your body and heart.

I'm glad to hear that you and your partner discussed STIs beforehand though. Did he share the last time that he got those negative results? Negative results are the only way to know that someone who's been sexual with someone else doesn't have an STI.
The cost that you mentioned for sexual/reproductive healthcare is definitely a bummer, but there are usually free clinics around (including some local health departments) that can provide cheap or free STI testing. My favorite tool to use is the CDC lookup (https://gettested.cdc.gov/), which just requires plugging in your zip code. We can also help you find one that works for you as well!