Tampon help

[Cantaloupe]

I hope I'm posting this in the right place.

I've been putting off learning how to put in a tampon for years. The couple of times when I was invited to go swimming during the wrong time of the month, I lay on my bed holding one for almost an hour, then gave up and said I couldn't go. Now I have a job at a summer camp where I need to get in the pool with the kids every day, so I need to figure out how to do this. Any advice?

I think part of the problem is that I've always had a hard time translating nice clean diagrams to real life, and I'm scared of stabbing myself in the wrong place (orifice). Another thing is that even if I can be completely sure I found the right place, I'm not sure if I want to stick anything in there, though I'm increasingly of the opinion that this is something I want to get over (my job is just setting an unanticipated deadline on it). I'm not sure if those are the only reasons or if there are more. Did anyone else have a hard time figuring out tampons? Any tips?

[Sam W]

Hi Cantaloupe,

Yep, this forum is a great place for this topic! And trust me, you're far from the first person to have a hard time figuring out tampons .

When you say you're not sure you want to stick anything in your vaginal canal, is that hesitancy tied to anything specific, such as worries about cleanliness?

With being worried about putting the tampon in the wrong place, have you taken time to check out your genitals and get the lay of the land with mirror? If not, that might be a good starting place, as it might dial down some of those worries about how you'll know if the tampon is in the right place.

Another really common culprit of tampon troubles is the position someone is in when they try to insert it. Ideally you want to be in a position that keeps your legs wide, giving you lots of room to work, and it may take you a few tries to find the position that works best for your body. One that a lot of people find works well is to stand with one leg up on the edge of something like a tub or toilet. Another thing you could try is to see if there's a type of tampon that works best for you. For instance, some people find that tampons with applicators actually make the whole process harder and prefer ones without.

[Cantaloupe]

I got fed up with the plastic applicator (too cold, could barely force myself to touch it) and the tampon without one (too rough, ditto) and just started poking around with my finger. I pushed aside a couple layers of folds (no obvious hole like in the diagrams) until I encountered a very clear NOT FOR TOUCHING, DO NOT PUT THINGS IN HERE signal. Is this normal? Do people seriously put up with this? Am I looking in the wrong direction?

When I try again tomorrow, is it safe to hold the applicator until it warms to body temp or does that make it unsanitary?

[Sam W]

Got it. When you say your body gave off a "don't put things here" signal when you tried to insert a finger, was that signal pain? Or was it more that the sensation of trying to put your finger in felt uncomfortable or foreign? You may want to look at this advice column, if you haven't already done so, to see if any of what's being described matches your experiences: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/advi ... hould_i_do.

If temperature of the applicator is an issue, holding it (still wrapped) in your hand seems like a good way to warm it up a little.

[Amanda F]

Hey Cantaloupe,

Great idea to poke around with your finger! Sometimes the entrance to the vagina can be difficult to see, even using a mirror - and feeling it can sometimes be tricky too. Don't give up yet, though - this is a great chance to get to know your awesome vulva and vagina.

How were you feeling during your exploration? If you were getting the "do not enter" signal, it might have been because you were feeling tense. Relaxing your body can help relax the muscles around the vagina, which can make it easier to insert things. If possible, try to take some time - like half an hour or more - to calmly and slowly explore your vulva and vagina, with no pressure to "achieve" anything.

If you feel comfortable, try and locate the entrance to your vagina. It may feel a little softer/squishier than the surrounding area. You'll know if it's the wrong hole (touching your anus will create a similar sensation to when you poop). You can rest your finger right at the entrance and put the tiniest amount of pressure, and see how that feels. After a few minutes of getting used to that feeling, your body may relax a bit and you might be able to go deeper.

Doing this exercise in different positions might also help (lying on your back, kneeling, standing, etc.). You could also try adding a little bit of lubrication, as that makes it easier to insert things as well. See this article for more info: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodi ... tle_primer