I'm ready to date, but I don't know how.

[Meadow]

I am a 16 year old girl, and I believe that I am ready to date, but I don't know how to. I am an introvert, and when it comes to talking to guys I find attractive (and making friends in general), I find it hard to communicate and a feeling of fear rises inside of me. I want to be able to talk to anybody with out that fear, and I'm very interested in dating, especially considering the friends I do have talk about their experiences and they seem to be having fun. But how do I actually get over my fear?

[Siân]

hi Meadow

Welcome to the boards!

Yeah, a lot of people find talking to new people - especially people we think are cool/fun/attractive - nerve-wracking. Adding on the potential pressure of dating can be extra-daunting, but it doesn't have to be! In general, a good date or a relationship is one where we enjoy the other person's company so I think that the best dating advice is to try meeting more people in general, including people you might like to be friends with. Maybe some of those will also be people you want to date. Cultivating friendships is fulfilling in itself, and also gives you practice at interacting with new people and allowing relationships to develop in a more introvert-friendly way than doing loads of dating and always having to be "on". Does that sounds like something you might try?

Of course, it's easy for me to say "just go meet more people!" but we need to think of situations where that might work for you. It doesn't have to mean going to loads of parties, what about groups or clubs based on structured activities or hobbies you enjoy that give you something in common to work from?