how do I masturbate without using porn?

[TVfan134]

I am having problems with masturbating without the use of porn. I am a heterosexual male and I know using porn to masturbate is wrong in my religion, however, I am still using porn. I want to be able to masturbate without porn and without feeling guilty about it. Can you give me advice of what I should do? I know I am attempting to do this without being lustful.

[Siân]

Hey TVfan134

This is a big question, and it sounds like there are a couple of parts to it. It sounds like you're feeling a lot of shame about the idea of masturbation at all - is that right? Sexual shame can take a while to undo, and ultimately only you can decide what you do and don't feel okay about doing within your own value system. I'd suggest you read these two articles, and then have a think: what is it that you feel guilty about? What do you want masturbation to be like?

Undoing sexual shame
Is masturbation wrong?

When you've done that, perhaps you can start thinking about the role porn plays in your masturbation - what is it about porn that makes you feel particularly guilty? What can you use instead? I'm guessing that when you talk about porn you mean videos (correct me if I'm wrong!). Do you feel okay about e.g. reading dirty stories, or making up fantasies for yourself in your head?