feeling anxious and scared to take action

[Berkeley2003]

Hi there!

I've been increasingly feeling overwhelmed with my gender identity. I've mentioned in past posts here about navigating and understanding my voice dysphoria. I've come to the realization that my extreme discomfort of my voice creates a lot of "buzzing white noise" that occupies my mental space and impacts me really negatively. It leaves me feeling depressed, detached from life, and makes it hard to get life/work tasks complete.

I've been doing trans vocal training for a little while. I know that it's a slow, ongoing process to achieve progress. Despite it, I still have a lot of that "buzzing white noise" from my voice dysphoria that distresses me. I think I need to start HRT (specifically T) to help me get rid of that mental noise. I'm planning to call my medical provider and start a consultation. I just feel scared and I don't know if I'm doing the right thing?

[Sam W]

Hi Berkeley2003,

I'm glad you've been able to start voice training! Even if it's slow going, that's still a great step in terms of doing something that will help you feel more at home in your body.

Can you tell me a little more about the fear you're feeling around all this? Does it seem attached to a specific element of T, or of transition more generally?