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Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Questions and discussion about contraception, safer sex, STIs, sexual healthcare and other sexual health issues.
HsurNiarb
not a newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2015 2:53 am
Age: 28
Awesomeness Quotient: I am open minded, honest, and kind!
Primary language: English, please.
Pronouns: They/Them unless otherwise specified. (Gender flui
Sexual identity: Pansexual, methinks.
Location: United States

Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Unread post by HsurNiarb »

Hi there! I hope I'm posting under the right thread here... Sorry if I am not!

Anyways.

My partner and I are... Ahem... Interested in anal sex. There. I said it. My problem here is that I, the one who is to be doing the penetrating, do not have a penis. As a gender-fluid individual, I'll be using either a strap-on or a prosthetic, and both are made of silicone.

My partner doesn't much care for oil based lubricants, and I have no idea how safe oil based lubricant is for silicone. Water based lubricants aren't really reccomended for anal sex because the anus and rectum don't produce much (if any) natural lubricant, and water is too quickly absorbed and evaporated to properly lubricate that drier area. Silicone based lubricants will destroy my strap on or prosthetic, and I greatly value both. (The prosthetic was crazy expensive!)

So I can't use oil, water, or silicone based lubricant, but I really need to use lubricant to protect my partner! Are there any other options? Am I stuck with oil based? S.O.S! (Save Our Silicone!)
HsurNiarb
not a newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2015 2:53 am
Age: 28
Awesomeness Quotient: I am open minded, honest, and kind!
Primary language: English, please.
Pronouns: They/Them unless otherwise specified. (Gender flui
Sexual identity: Pansexual, methinks.
Location: United States

Re: Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Unread post by HsurNiarb »

Perhaps a condom over the intended phallus would be helpful in protecting both the hardware and my partner? If anything, my partner's safety, comfort, and happiness is what matters most, but daaaaang those prosthetics and strap ons are pricey!
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Hsurniarb,

A condom should help protect the toy, plus is a good call for basic sanitary purposes. Another thing that might work is to use a bunch of water based lube, rather than just a little, and plan to stop and reapply it as needed (that doesn't always feel like the sexiest option, but it's preferable to damaging the toy or causing the person discomfort/pain).
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
HsurNiarb
not a newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2015 2:53 am
Age: 28
Awesomeness Quotient: I am open minded, honest, and kind!
Primary language: English, please.
Pronouns: They/Them unless otherwise specified. (Gender flui
Sexual identity: Pansexual, methinks.
Location: United States

Re: Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Unread post by HsurNiarb »

Thank you very much! I will certainly go for that.

Do you know how oil based lubricant affects silicone at all? I couldn't figure that out.
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Unread post by Sam W »

I'm finding some contradictory info as well, so can see how it would be confusing to work out. It looks like some oil based lubes can be damaging to silicone toys, as well as potentially the harnesses. However, you can try spot testing your toy. Put a little bit of the lube in question on the toy, and then rub it vigorously, then clean. If the spot feels the same as the rest of the toy, you're probably okay. If it feels stickier, then that lube is a no-go with that toy. So, it looks like water based is still the safest bet.
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
HsurNiarb
not a newbie
Posts: 17
Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2015 2:53 am
Age: 28
Awesomeness Quotient: I am open minded, honest, and kind!
Primary language: English, please.
Pronouns: They/Them unless otherwise specified. (Gender flui
Sexual identity: Pansexual, methinks.
Location: United States

Re: Sexual Safety: Lubri"can't" figure some stuff out

Unread post by HsurNiarb »

Alrighty. Thanks so much!
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