I feel worried.

Any questions or discussions that you ONLY want to discuss with our staff or volunteers.
(Users: please do not reply to other users here.)
mlpv7193
newbie
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2015 3:50 pm
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm humble.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: none
Location: South Gate

I feel worried.

Unread post by mlpv7193 »

Why am I feeling worried since that day when me and my boyfriend tried to do sex but nothing happened. The first time we tried having sex he was on top of me. He put his penis but it didn't go inside my vagina. Then in seconds I pushed him off. The second time he was on top of me i couldn't even do it. Their was no sperm at all twice when we tried doing it. It was actually my first time experiencing this but I didn't kept going because I'm not ready yet. He respected my decision to not keep going till I'm ready. So if there was no sperm no nothing I shouldn't be worrying? Is it my nervousness that I am going through?
Redskies
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1281
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 11:33 am
Primary language: English
Pronouns: they/them or she/her
Sexual identity: bisexual/queer/pansexual
Location: Europe

Re: I feel worried.

Unread post by Redskies »

Welcome to the boards.

Can you fill us on what you're feeling worried about? I hear that you're feeling worried, but I'm not sure what information or support you most need, and I don't want to miss something.

You mentioned sperm, so are you concerned about the possibility of pregnancy? Are you using any kind of contraception? If you're not, then direct genital-to-genital contact has some risk of pregnancy. As he didn't ejaculate, the risk is lower. If you used contraception and you used it correctly, the risk of pregnancy is very small. How long ago did this happen? Direct genital-to-genital contact also poses risks of STI transmission, so for the future, we'd always recommend using condoms. Once you're sexually active, it's important to keep up to date with sexual healthcare, including STI testing. Have you started getting that healthcare, or do you need any help accessing it?

I'm glad you were able to identify that you didn't feel ready and stopped, and your boyfriend respected that. Sometimes, starting out doing something we don't feel ready for, or feeling rushed by someone else, or finding we don't feel ready part-way through, can leave us feeling a bit shaken or worried. Did you strongly want to have this kind of genital contact and intercourse, and did you both discuss it beforehand?
The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not.
mlpv7193
newbie
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2015 3:50 pm
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm humble.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: none
Location: South Gate

Re: I feel worried.

Unread post by mlpv7193 »

This happened two weeks ago but my boyfriend didn't feel his sperm coming at all so he said nothing happend at all. I worry so much that I maybe pregnant but theirs no possibility I could be because we didn't take long we tried but I was the one not ready for it. I guess that's what I'm having since that day feeling worried that I maybe but theirs no way I can be because their was no ejaculation. What can I do so I don't worry so much?
mlpv7193
newbie
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2015 3:50 pm
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm humble.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: none
Location: South Gate

Re: I feel worried.

Unread post by mlpv7193 »

It was only seconds that we tried both times and from their we stopped.
Ashleah
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 463
Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2014 7:14 am
Age: 37
Awesomeness Quotient: "I'm a woman phenomenally"
Primary language: English
Pronouns: She/Her
Sexual identity: Straight
Location: Atlanta

Re: I feel worried.

Unread post by Ashleah »

Hi mlpv,

i just want to it to be clear for you and any one else that reads this thread that direct genital to genital contact does pose a risk, but the risk is very low when there is no ejaculation.

Here is an article that discusses some things you can do to help you through your scare: http://www.scarleteen.com/the_pregnancy ... _or_missed

Can you take a look at it and come back to let us know if it is helpful for you? If you want to talk it out more we'd be happy to do that with you.

Many of the suggestions focus on taking care of yourself and trying to spend more time doing activities that will help relief some of your anxiety such as spending time with friends, reading, or other things you like to do.

Another big piece is reflecting on why you might be having these fears. You have already identified that you weren't feeling ready, which can cause people to have pregnancy fears! There are some great links in the article about readiness and sexual decision making if you want to explore that more.
mlpv7193
newbie
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2015 3:50 pm
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm humble.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: none
Location: South Gate

Re: I feel worried.

Unread post by mlpv7193 »

Well thank you very much ashleah! I read it through and it did help. I feel more comfortable now that my period started today which i was also expecting these days too. It's true what redskies said that experiencing something were not ready to do may have us feeling worried and a bit shaken. So that was a feeling i was having these past days. I give a big thanks to you both for the info and advices that I can now take throughout my future.
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post