Not ok
Forum rules
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.
Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.
Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.
Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.
Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
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Dandelion
- not a newbie
- Posts: 41
- Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2015 11:50 pm
- Age: 24
- Awesomeness Quotient: Creativity
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: her/she
- Sexual identity: Bisexual female
- Location: United States
Not ok
Im not ok. My head is so fuzzy. I feel floaty. Haven't been here since church. Triggered me my pastor. I can't remember what he talked about. Just scratching my leg trying not to slip into a flashback. I dont want to be alone. I feel unsafe. So scared. Monsters want to come back. I feel small. Im not ok. Its not right. I feel bad. No one is home right now. I dont know how to ground myself.
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Ashleah
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 463
- Joined: Tue Nov 11, 2014 7:14 am
- Age: 37
- Awesomeness Quotient: "I'm a woman phenomenally"
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: She/Her
- Sexual identity: Straight
- Location: Atlanta
Re: Not ok
Hi Dandelion,
I hate to hear that you are feeling like this. No person should feel unsafe in anyway. You do not deserve to feel this way.
Can I check in and make sure you aren't currently at risk for any physical harm. Your safety is of utmost importance to us and most certainly a priority!
Do you think that being able to talk to someone right now would be helpful? Last week Mo gave you info to a local resource, The Center, which has a 24 hour hotline. Do you have access to a phone where you can give them a call?
I hate to hear that you are feeling like this. No person should feel unsafe in anyway. You do not deserve to feel this way.
Can I check in and make sure you aren't currently at risk for any physical harm. Your safety is of utmost importance to us and most certainly a priority!
Do you think that being able to talk to someone right now would be helpful? Last week Mo gave you info to a local resource, The Center, which has a 24 hour hotline. Do you have access to a phone where you can give them a call?
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Dandelion
- not a newbie
- Posts: 41
- Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2015 11:50 pm
- Age: 24
- Awesomeness Quotient: Creativity
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: her/she
- Sexual identity: Bisexual female
- Location: United States
Re: Not ok
My mom isback. I locked my door. I feel safer that way I can't make calls with her home. I should've before. When alone. I'm stupid. Sorry. I dont feel like myself.
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Dandelion
- not a newbie
- Posts: 41
- Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2015 11:50 pm
- Age: 24
- Awesomeness Quotient: Creativity
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: her/she
- Sexual identity: Bisexual female
- Location: United States
Re: Not ok
Im struggling so much tonight. I feel more here but more in pain. I just woke up from a nightmare and its like I can't breathe. I dont understand why this is so hard. I just want to recover and be okay. But its like the world is against me. I'm tired of everything. I'm so absolutely tired. Tired of writing posts here and wasting everyone's time. I have exhausted myself begging for therapy. I am so sick of spending my nights curled up in a corner because I'm afraid of getting hurt. I just want to be ok. And I'm tired of waiting.
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Snorkmaiden
- not a newbie
- Posts: 85
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:35 am
- Age: 56
- Awesomeness Quotient: I like to help.
- Primary language: Dutch
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: straight butch
- Location: Netherlands
Re: Not ok
You are not wasting anyone's time here. You are always, always welcome to come here when you need to vent.
You haven't heard from me before but I'm very sorry to hear you are feeling so low and afraid! If I could I'd give you a big hug (if you wanted one) and a big mug of tea and let you talk all you wanted: a lot, a little or not at all.
You haven't heard from me before but I'm very sorry to hear you are feeling so low and afraid! If I could I'd give you a big hug (if you wanted one) and a big mug of tea and let you talk all you wanted: a lot, a little or not at all.
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Sam W
- previous staff/volunteer
- Posts: 10320
- Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
- Age: 33
- Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
- Primary language: english
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: queer
- Location: Coast
Re: Not ok
Dandelion, Snorkmaiden is absolutely right. And honestly, it's understandable that you're feeling tired and frustrated. You have a lot to heal from, and your family in particular (from what you've told us) is not helping you in that process. You get to have moments of feeling tired, but please know that those feelings don't mean you're wasting anyone's time, or that you're not making progress otherwise.
If you have the opportunity today, it sounds like a good plan would be to call the resource Ashleah gave you, to give you someone to talk through these feelings with who is trained to support you around them (sometimes simply being able to process all your feelings in real time on the phone can be really helpful in feeling better).
If you have the opportunity today, it sounds like a good plan would be to call the resource Ashleah gave you, to give you someone to talk through these feelings with who is trained to support you around them (sometimes simply being able to process all your feelings in real time on the phone can be really helpful in feeling better).
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
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Dandelion
- not a newbie
- Posts: 41
- Joined: Fri Jul 10, 2015 11:50 pm
- Age: 24
- Awesomeness Quotient: Creativity
- Primary language: English
- Pronouns: her/she
- Sexual identity: Bisexual female
- Location: United States
Re: Not ok
Thank you. I appreciate the support. It's hard not to believe I waste people's time. I dont think I'm helpable.