How long after I masturbate should I feel something down there?

[8888]

So I masturbated last night in the early evening. As I went to bed I didn't feel anything afterward. But when I woke up I felt like I had just masturbated. Is that normal? Or could it be impacted by whatever was in my dream last night?

[Sam W]

Hi 8888,

When you say you felt like you had just masturbated when you woke up, can you clarify for me what you mean by that?

[cath]

There are so many ways to experience sexual feelings and satisfaction, I hesitate to qualify anyone's experience as "normal". Since the mind is such an active part of the sexual experience, I would not be surprised if your dream activity triggered some feelings of excitement in your subconscious. What a nice feeling to wake up to!

[8888]

I just felt sensations in my private area like I had just masturbated. It felt the same as masturbation felt the night before. I don't feel much and tend to be too rough when I masturbate because I need to be rough to feel anything due to medication side effects. I did it hard but I thought the feeling would have worn off my morning. Sorry if I am not explaining it well. All I remember about the dream I had is I was sucking lemons. Don't remember anything sexual. Unfortunately it was not a nice feeling to wake up to. I'm a sexual assault survivor so I sometimes feel guilty feeling pleasure, plus it was kind of an uncomfortable feeling.

[cath]

8888,
I apologize for being insensitive. I would not claim to have any insight into what you are experiencing, but I hope that you find support in this community. Is there a dialogue happening between you and your prescribing doctor about the side effects of your medication and different techniques you could use to practice self love in a way that feels safe?

[8888]

It's fine, I didn't find you insensitive. I need to bring that up with the doctor. The thing is, as much as I hate this side effect, the medication really helps me and I've been on similar drugs that either didn't work or had worse side effects. I'll have to ask her if there is anything new on the market.

[cath]

I hope that you do. They say that the brain is the biggest erogenous zone, but for some it is the biggest blockade to experiencing sexual pleasure. It sounds like one option you could try might be to confront the guilt feelings when you identify them, and engage in some mild cognitive behavioral therapy by redirecting your negative thoughts into positive ones. It takes a lot of work to change the way we think, but this could be a way that you can take control over the negative patterns. For example, a mantra like 'I deserve to feel good' or 'my pleasure is important'...try different ones out and see what you like. I am not a professional, but small acts of thought redirection are important pieces of building self confidence and changing harmful patterns in your life.