My situation

[hedjoss]

Hello all over again Scarleteeen.

First of all I want to tell you THANK YOU SO MUCH, for all the information, the data and the new point of view about some serious things.

I want to tell you my case.
I recently got diagnosed with OCD, and all started with a pregnancy scare.

I have made some question in your "Pregnancy and Parenting" Q&A space, and all were in base of my actual situation, and I saw that I became annoying for you (sorry 'bout that by the way).

I normally get scared by things like:
-Spermatorrhea
-Spontaneous ejaculation
-Pregnancy through clothe
- ...

And this make my life harder, even more with my gf.

So please, bear with me, would you answer some specific questions about some things in the posts?

[Karyn]

Since it sounds like your fear is coming from your OCD, and we have already given you pretty much all the information we can about how pregnancy happens and what is or is not a risk, I would suggest that you focus on learning to manage your OCD and anxiety. Are you seeing a therapist or any mental health professional at the moment?

[hedjoss]

Yes, I do, actually I see him every week.

I just want to ask a couple of questions that still without understand, and those questions are in base of information from the posts.

Can I?

[Karyn]

I'm glad to hear that you're seeing a therapist regularly.

What issues do you still need clarification with?

[hedjoss]

Thank you so much.

Pretty much, one in my head right now is with ejaculated and clothe.

I read that pregnancy in dry humping is not possible, I read too that if both people are fully clothed (like 4 piece of clothing) isn't a possibility either, but, what if (hypothetically speaking) someone ejaculated in a vulva but the girl is only wearing thin underwear (and I'm speaking normal underwear made of cotton or polyester or that kind of underwear, not lace underwear or things like that), in other words, just one piece of clothing between vulva and semen? Does exist possibility of pregnancy? The fabric of the underwear makes any difference?

[Karyn]

Underwear counts as clothing, and so the risks are as stated in this piece, which we have linked you to in the past: Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?

Specifically, this section: "Level of pregnancy risk: No risk, so long as at least one partner is wearing clothing that covers their genitals."

[hedjoss]

Then I assume that what I said in my hypothetical scene is that there are not a risk of pregnancy.

Am I right?

[Karyn]

That is correct.

I realise that you feel that more information will help you, but I would encourage you to do what you can to stop seeking out more facts, and focus on dealing with the underlying cause of your worry, which is the OCD. Have you talked with your therapist at all about what to do when you're concerned about some small detail like this?

[hedjoss]

Umm, I told him what I do, when I am concerned about something, but I don't if is the correct thing to do.

What I do is seek info in Scarleteen like in post and entries from other users, but is kind of stressful

What can I do?

[Heather]

When you have told your therapist that you seek validation in places like this, and keep asking the same questions again and again (both of which don't help manage anxiety, they just help keep someone in it), what did they suggest you do instead?

[hedjoss]

Hello Heather, sorry for being so annoying

Umm, he actually didn't told me what to do, and the reason is that I can't control myself so well, and if I can find an answer in that moment about my doubt then I can "breath", because I can finally rest, but in the searching process I'm stressed as hell.

He gave me fluoxetine, and he says that the pills will help me.

Any recommendation, please?

[Sam W]

Then I'd suggest the next time you meet with him that you ask him directly what he'd recommend you do in moments where you feel that need to seek validation or reassurance by asking the same questions you've asked before. You and he can develop some tools and plans for what to do when you feel like that.

[hedjoss]

Ok Sam, sorry all over again for being so annoying
I swear that being like that isn't my intention, I just want peace of mind.

[Sam W]

No need to apologize, figuring out what is going to be the most helpful thing to work on with a therapist takes time. You can think of it like experimenting, where you need some trial and error to figure out what's working and what isn't.

[hedjoss]

Yes, actually, by myself I am ultra fine, but something need to happen to trigger my anxiety, like something I hear, something I see in the school, in the street, in the bus, or in my own house.

Scarleteen it's the most helpful tool that I found, really.

Can I make another question, please? I didn't found a direct answer to this one.

[Karyn]

Because continuing to focus on the thing that's stressing you out actually tends to make anxiety worse, I'm going to set a limit here: we will not discuss the details of how pregnancy happens with you anymore.

I understand that you want peace of mind, and that all this anxiety is so difficult to deal with, but your therapist is the person to help you with that. Would you like some help figuring out how to talk to them about this?

[hedjoss]

*A LITTLE UPDATE*

Hello, Scarleteen, sorry for not answering the post, but this last week was the tests week in my school.

Some good news, I recently have feel amazing, this whole two weeks, and I think that the pills are actually working.

I just want to say something, after you tell me how pregnancy happens in any of my questions is not a thing that will be deleted from my brain in the next couple minutes, your answer helps me a lot.

If you read carefully my questions, I don't make the same question two times, I make some questions about one same topic, and the reason is that I've learned that a little detail makes the difference, so I tried to include all the possibilities that I can imagine. And I like to think that your answers aren't just for me, but for someone else that may need help like me.

Please, would you answer my questions? They are not difficult ones, all my questions are in base of the post in Scarleteen, but they are some that I need clarification with.

Thank you so much.

[Heather]

Karyn set a hard limit with you.

When someone does that, in any circumstance, you need to respect it, rather than trying to push past it or talk the person who set the limit out of their limit. Please remember that everyone needs to be allowed to have limits and boundaries, be that an individual, a service or both, and a community based on mutual respect needs to involve accepting limits and boundaries rather than refusing them.

Regardless of the apparent value to you of answers around questions that limit was set with, please remember you are not the only person involved here. The needs (and limitations) of our staff and organization matter as well as your own needs, which we have met as best we can, within the range of what we know to be effective and feel is appropriate.

Please respect the limits our staff have set with you moving forward. Thank you.