help!!

Any questions or discussions that you ONLY want to discuss with our staff or volunteers.
(Users: please do not reply to other users here.)
girl
not a newbie
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 8:49 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: im friendly
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Location: us

help!!

Unread post by girl »

i just had sex on monday without being on birth control and not using a condom. he didnt cum in me tho but like 2 hours after we went to cvs and got afterra and that was the second time ive taken that pill within one month. and today i had unprotected sex again without being on birth control as well. is there any possibilities that afterra i took yesterday could help me with this times unprotected sex or should i take another one to be sure
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: help!!

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi girl,

Emergency contraception only works to protect against a single incident, so if you had unprotected sex again you'll want to take another dose.

Can I ask why you and your partner continue to have unprotected sex when it makes you anxious? And are you both up to date on your STI tests?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
girl
not a newbie
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 8:49 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: im friendly
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Location: us

Re: help!!

Unread post by girl »

we're not up to date on STI tests and i was a virgin before i met him but i know that has had sex with two other girls before me... im thinking anout telling my parents everything so i can just be open with my parents and also get necessary testing for my health do u think its the right thing to do?
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: help!!

Unread post by Sam W »

I would suggest both you and he get tested for STIs. As for telling your parents, that's certainly an option if it's something you're comfortable with and feel safe doing. If you like, we can help you come up with some approaches to telling them.

If you and he are planning to have sex in the future, have you discussed what methods of contraception you'll use so that this situation doesn't keep happening?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
girl
not a newbie
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 8:49 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: im friendly
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Location: us

Re: help!!

Unread post by girl »

im only 16.. as a minor do i need a parent to get sti testing? and please inform me in ways i can approach my parents and im not planning on having sex with him ever again
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9703
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: help!!

Unread post by Heather »

Nope, you don't. Your sexual health information is private in the United States under HIPAA legal policies.

If, however, you'd like to tell them about your sexual life, we can talk about that. Can you give a picture of what it's like at home for you? Is your family generally very loving and supportive, even if and when they don't agree with your choices?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
girl
not a newbie
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 8:49 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: im friendly
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Location: us

Re: help!!

Unread post by girl »

im thinking about just telling my mom for now... i've never had to tell her about these things before so i dont know how she'll handle it but my parents are really strict and does not like me hanging out with boys and ive been lying to them all along about going to his house..
girl
not a newbie
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 8:49 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: im friendly
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Location: us

Re: help!!

Unread post by girl »

also how do i get a sti testing on my own and where?
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9703
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: help!!

Unread post by Heather »

You have a few options for seeking out testing. You can do that via a sexual health clinic -- like a Planned Parenthood branch -- or a public/county health clinic, or you can do that through your usual doctor. Which you choose depends on what you feel most comfortable with and what you have access to.

In terms of talking with your mother, it might help for us to also have an idea about what you're looking for from that conversation. Obviously, if you have to disclose both being dishonest and engaging in sex, any conversation is going to likely be full of some hard feelings and potential conflict. What would you ideally like to come out of that conversation? What do you want, and what are you hoping for?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
girl
not a newbie
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 8:49 pm
Age: 24
Awesomeness Quotient: im friendly
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Location: us

Re: help!!

Unread post by girl »

im hoping to just be honest with my mom about everything so i dont need to hide anything from her and im hoping that this could potentially lead further down the road to growing a better bond with my mom. also i want to tell her so she can help me with getting tested for any disease and also pregnancy test.. im scared to go through this alone
Sam W
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 10320
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Coast

Re: help!!

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi girl,

One suggestion then is to practice saying what you want to say to her and working out what approach feels best for you. If you want, you can even write down what you want to say to decrease the chances of freezing up during the conversation. You'll also want to think about how she might react to this conversation and what you'll do in the case of those reactions.

I wanted to check, is your boyfriend also taking steps to get tested, or is it right now only you who is planning on getting it?
And you to whom adversity has dealt the final blow/with smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go/turn to and put out all your strength of arm and heart and brain/and like the Mary Ellen Carter rise again.
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic