vaginal health questions

[tos3]

So, this isn't more of a question this is just a huge question mark in my life right now.

I have been having very frequent unprotected monogamous sex with my partner for around 6 months now. Currently I am in the middle of the 3rd UTI I've had this year (I'm pretty sure) and I've suffered a yeast infection in the past. I'm not sure if these infections are just par for the course in my relationship or if there's something I can do about them.

The healthcare I get is pretty bad, the gynecologist's place I go to just frowns at me when I tell them I'm having unprotected sex and just tells me to "use a condom" as if that will make all my problems go away (that was the first time I went there since dating him.) The second time, it took the doctor 45 minutes to get in there and all she could tell me was that I was suffering from "pelvic pain" ???? and then she wrote me a referral to a....physical therapist....for my vagina? It didn't make any sense to me. What were they gonna do, massage the walls of my vagina or something? No thank you.

I looked up pelvic pain on the internet and it's about as vague as it sounds. I have no idea what's wrong with me, maybe my vagina is just too small or something but sex is really painful at the same time as it's pleasurable, and no amount of foreplay or orgasming beforehand seems to make it go away. It almost feels like there's a long tear along the right inside wall or something, even though idk if it's that.

In the mean time, is there some literature I can read on vaginal healthcare/UTIs/yeast infections? Do any of you all out there have any information that might help me?

[Mo]

We do have some information about UTIs and yeast infections that you might find helpful: Out, Out Damn UTI!
Yeast Infections

Are you able to ask for a referral to another gynecologist, or find another one yourself? It sounds like the person you've been seeing isn't particularly helpful, or interested in really talking with you to find the source of your issues, and I think having a doctor who's really listening might be helpful here. Also, when you did talk to them, did they do any STI testing (or are you otherwise up to date on your testing through another clinic)? If you and your partner aren't up to date on testing, that would be something to take care of too, in case there's an infection that's a factor in the pain you're having. We do have an article about pain with intercourse: From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse However, if the pain you're feeling continues to feel like an injury it may be a good idea to hold off on attempting intercourse until you can have someone take a look. You might even be able to take a look yourself, with a hand mirror.

[tos3]

yes we're both up to date on infections so that's not a problem. Thank you so much for your quick reply!

[Heather]

Just a quick few tips:
1) With the UTIs, it might help if your partner washed their genitals and pubic hair before sexual activity. UTIs happen because of bacteria that gets into that tract, so doing things to get rid of bacteria in the first place can help (this is also why condom use can help, so no judgment about not using them, but it is worth reconsidering by that token).
2) If you are getting UTIs often, you might want to ask your doctor if taking preventative medication is an option for you. That can mean taking a medication for UTIs ahead of any sex, or taking one daily, at a small dose, on an ongoing basis.
3) I;d strongly suggest you don't engage in any kind of sex that is painful for you. For one, we don't know what's going on yet to know if that's making things worse. But second, the more often someone experiences pain from something like that, the more it becomes a self-perpetuating cycle. Why not just stick to the kinds of sex that ONLY feel good and don't hurt in any way?