Problems having sex

[abh]

Every time I try to have sex it just won't go in to my vagina no matter how much lube or how turned on I am. I am a sexual abuse victim (years ago) but I got therapy and continue therapy so I don't know why it won't go in. I'm perfectly relaxed and want it. The only time I ever got a penis in to me I had done drugs . I know that isn't the answer, but its the only thing that's worked so far. What is my problem? Am I doing something wrong? Is it my low cervix?

[Mo]

Hi abh, welcome to Scarleteen.

I'm sorry to hear you're having trouble with intercourse. Have you tried inserting something smaller than a penis, like a well-lubed gloved finger or fingers? That might be a helpful way to start, so you can get used to the feeling of something smaller inside you and work up from there. Gloves aren't required here but can cut down on friction or any irritation from sharp nails so I think they'd be helpful.
It sounds like you're taking care of the basic points in this article (lots of lube, being very aroused) but it may be a helpful read all the same: From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse

Are there other types of sex you do enjoy? If intercourse isn't working for you right now, it's ok to focus on the kinds of sex you and your partner both like. There are people who just aren't excited about intercourse and it's entirely possible to have a fantastic sexual life without it, whether that's temporary or not.