Uncomfortable with swimming, any tips?

[KittyPink]

I don't like swimming in swim shorts, and swimming in guy stuff makes me really upset, any ideas?

[capablehippie]

Hi KittyPink!
It seems from what you've said before that you don't/can't wear feminine clothing in public (true?). Do you think you could wear a bikini bottom under your swim shorts? Can you say what is bothersome about the swim shorts? As a cis person, I might be overstepping my bounds by trying to answer, so just let me know if that's the case, and if it is, I'm sorry.

[Mo]

If you'd feel better wearing some sort of top as well, you could look into a rash guard (sometimes marketed as a swim shirt); maybe there would be a color or style that would feel feminine enough to keep you happy without being super obvious if you're worried about safety.

[KittyPink]

Hi KittyPink!
It seems from what you've said before that you don't/can't wear feminine clothing in public (true?). Do you think you could wear a bikini bottom under your swim shorts? Can you say what is bothersome about the swim shorts? As a cis person, I might be overstepping my bounds by trying to answer, so just let me know if that's the case, and if it is, I'm sorry.

I do wear feminine clothes at school, that's about it. I'm not sure if I could do something like wearing a bikini bottom under the shorts, given my mother typically takes me swimming in the summer. (She might even check for them.) And, my mother probably wouldn't take finding out about that well. Oh, and what bothers me is well, the fit of the shorts feels super masculine to me and it just feels out of place on me.

If you'd feel better wearing some sort of top as well, you could look into a rash guard (sometimes marketed as a swim shirt); maybe there would be a color or style that would feel feminine enough to keep you happy without being super obvious if you're worried about safety.

I had thought about that, then realized my mother would probably give me flak for it.

[Jacob]

Alongside this... I'm wondering if the context of where and with who you swim could help make things easier.

Are there pools where there is a vibe you feel more comfortable with... that might make 'what to wear' feel a lot better.

I have to admit, I was so put off swimming by going to my university pool... I felt so much gaze, there was glass everywhere, I felt weird about my body, my gender, my sexuality... lots of people in the 'zone' doing exercise and seeming to me to be doing the exercise/body as a lifestyle thing... it was terrifying for me.

A more family friendly and community centred pool suddenly makes me feel really comfortable. 2 year olds don't care what I wear, young parents are too busy worrying about their 2 year old, to care what I look like. Elderly people don't care how I look, and there is a much wider general diversity of self-expression, body types and reasons for using the pool.

Could any of that be helpful too? I know it's not what you were initially asking, so no worries if not!

[KittyPink]

Alongside this... I'm wondering if the context of where and with who you swim could help make things easier.

Do you have any freaky geeky queer friends you can go swimming with? Or pools where there is a vibe you feel more comfortable with... that might make 'what to wear' feel a lot better.

I have to admit, I was so put off swimming by going to my university pool... I felt so much gaze, there was glass everywhere, I felt weird about my body, my gender, my sexuality... lots of people in the 'zone' doing exercise and seeming to me to be doing the exercise/body as a lifestyle thing... it was terrifying for me.

A more family friendly and community centred pool suddenly makes me feel really comfortable. 2 year olds don't care what I wear, young parents are too busy worrying about their 2 year old, to care what I look like. Elderly people don't care how I look, and there is a much wider general diversity of self-expression, body types and reasons for using the pool.

Could any of that be helpful too? I know it's not what you were initially asking, so no worries if not!

Unfortunately, the last of my queer friends I'm pretty sure moved. (To be honest, I don't blame them.) Pools are something I really don't know about.

[capablehippie]

What if instead of being a bikini bottom, it was a speedo or speedo-like bottom? Something that looks masculine enough for your mom, but might still feel better than swim trunks?

[KittyPink]

What if instead of being a bikini bottom, it was a speedo or speedo-like bottom? Something that looks masculine enough for your mom, but might still feel better than swim trunks?

Hmm, I'm not sure about that.

[Frida]

Hi, I'm AMAB but transfemme or genderfluid I'm not sure. And I understand what you mean by a masculine fit they're large and boxy and reach your knees and they look absolutely ridiculous. What you can try is buying swimming shorts from the women's section which are often much smaller in length and have a better fit or you could go into the kids section and section and search for something that fits. Hope this helps

[KittyPink]

Hi, I'm AMAB but transfemme or genderfluid I'm not sure. And I understand what you mean by a masculine fit they're large and boxy and reach your knees and they look absolutely ridiculous. What you can try is buying swimming shorts from the women's section which are often much smaller in length and have a better fit or you could go into the kids section and section and search for something that fits. Hope this helps

I agree that they look ridiculous, not to mention, some guys look out of place in swim shorts that boxy and large, it doesn't fit their frame. One of the things I did think about was buying women's swim shorts, although, I am a little concerned that down there might slip out, more so in two piece swimsuits.

[Sam W]

Hi Kittypink,

I recently learned about this etsy shop that makes swimwear specifically for trans women. It might be worth a look to see if you can find what you need.

[KittyPink]

Hi Kittypink,

I recently learned about this etsy shop that makes swimwear specifically for trans women. It might be worth a look to see if you can find what you need.

Oooh, can you link me please?

[Sam W]

Yep! This is the one: https://www.etsy.com/shop/LeoLines?ref= ... -info-name

[KittyPink]

Yep! This is the one: https://www.etsy.com/shop/LeoLines?ref= ... -info-name

Thanks, I'll have to look at it later, as etsy appears to be blocked on my school mac.